... what I know NOW, I'd love to be able to tell my 'then' self the following:
1. Weird long dark hairs are going to sprout up in places that you NEVER in a MILLION YEARS ever thought that hairs would grow. It's gross, but it's life. Get over it & invest in a really good lighted magnifying mirror & killer tweezers.
2. All those times you hear the older generations within your circle of family/friends talk about how gravity is not their friend, PAY ATTENTION! THEY'RE NOT SHITTIN'! Birds aren't they only things headed SOUTH my friend!
(and while we're on the subject, less carbs, more protein fruits & veggies & invest in a really good comfortable SPORTS BRA!)
3. Stuff is just that, stuff. It holds no real value other than a quick fix to whatever emotional problem you think is the current end of your life as you know it. Get over yourself! Spend your time & energy with family & friends and don't worry so much about what your neighbor has that you don't. Who CARES?!
4. You're going to buy a brand new VW in the summer of 96'. It'll be your FIRST EVER BRAND NEW CAR! Treat it like a BABY and not a mobile trash bin. It's going to last you ten years or MORE so be kind to it... freedom is your FRIEND!
(and FYI- car parts are EXPENSIVE to replace once your warranty runs out!)
5. Friends who you think are the best & are going to be there till you're old & grey are actually really going to disappear faster than cash in your pocket at the mall. Remember that if they were true friends to begin with, this won't be an issue... so when it happens (and it will happen more than once) let them go. They don't deserve you as their friend if they're taking you for granted.
6. Not much in life changes but the date on the calender... if you really want something in your life to change you have to get UP OFF YOUR ASS & make it happen! Don't wait forever for someone to pipe up & say " hey, did you want me to do this for you? I'd be HAPPY to!" because that's just bullshit. Life doesn't work that way... so if you truly make your own happiness then don't bitch to anyone but YOURSELF for those times when you're clearly unhappy. Whose fault is THAT?
7. Everything happens for a reason, I know... so cliche' but it's so friggen true it's disgusting! Down the road you're going to be treated horribly by guys who you are going to think actually care... trust me, they don't. Most guys want only one thing and if you DON'T give it to them ( you shouldn't) then sooner rather than later they'll disappear. It's the ones who stick around who are worth your time & every other 'gift' you have to offer them.
8. IF you should find a really good shirt or the most comfy pair of pants ever, BUY IT IN EVERY COLOR OR IN MULTIPLES! What's there right now, won't be there again next month so JUMP ON A GOOD DEAL when you FIND IT! (your future ass will thank you for getting those dark denim stretchy jeans in like a half dozen pairs so that even when one wears out, GUESS WHAT, you have BACKUP! It's a very very ASS FRIENDLY move to make!)
9. You're always going to feel like an overgrown kid. You'll hit your 30's & wonder if people really look at you as an adult or if they still see on your outside how you feel on the inside. Chances are they will if they know you well enough, and if not- just smile allot because strangers can't help but like you if you're smiling, they tend to be infectious.
10. Spend as much time as you can with Ebenezer, loving him, hugging him, going for walks with him, scratching behind his ears just the way he likes it... all too soon you'll be blogging about how you have this big empty hole in your heart where his fuzzy little body used to be.
(and you'll never ever ever forget him or stop missing him or loving him, period.)
(and finally, IF any of this were even remotely possible, OBVIOUSLY you know I'd be doling out WINNING LOTTERY NUMBERS! DUH!)
So... what is it that you would want to tell your younger self...
...Hmm??
This year, not so much...
This year, not so much...
