The 'Squat'...

...yep, that's right, and you ladies, regardless of size KNOW 'The Squat'.

Jeans come out of the dryer, all toasty & clean, excellent!
If only they slipped back onto your body all smooth & easy like...

... NOT SO MUCH!

One must patiently, carefully, slowly snug said jeans (which, I might add, were perfectly comfortable just prior to you washing them after having been worn a good week, ahhh I miss those jeans) and with the utmost precision, gently tug at the zipper (button fly jeans don't exist in my house) and once complete zip is accomplished, close your eyes, say a prayer & do up single solitary button & IMMEDIATELY EXHALE!

Ok, Jeans on, mission accomplished?
Not quite...

Now it's time for what ALL we ladies lovingly refer to as 'THE SQUAT'.
Where you forcefully slump your body down into a squatting position and gently bounce to stretch your newly acquired jeans into somewhat of a comfortable 'WEARING ZONE' so that you can walk around for the days events without looking like that damn rubber weird doll from the 80's OBIE (remember the weird bowling pin shaped guy who, when squeezed, his eyes & tongue popped out to high heaven & he looked not only drugged but possessed? LOL
Try not to imagine that look on my face but I'd be absolutely lying to you if I didn't admit that for the initial 'squat', this single Momma could easily pass for 'single Italian Obie'.
So sad.

Once the squat/bounce has been done for several repetitions you're in the 'kinda comfortable but not quite like it'll be two days from now' jean zone... and it's really all you can hope for on a 'fresh from the dryer' day... correct?

Whether you're a size 4 or a size 24, jeans out of a dryer require patience, understanding and a boatload of prayers.
And hell, if all that fails, break out the sweats, after all... it's a rainy shitty day & really, who is gonna be checking out my pants anyway, right? LOL

Next Blog... *updated*

... ever click on 'next blog' at the top of page just to see what you'll find?
I did this morning, came across one written all in a foreign language (looked like something bin'friggen' laden would've enjoyed) so a 'no go' on that one.
I click 'NEXT BLOG' again & came across this one...
* Amazing... I just finished reading it & all I can say is, who knew... who knew.
(wiping away tears)
When I tell you that I've been sitting here reading for well over 20 minutes & kinda let my morning slip away from me without so much as a blink, I'm not exaggerating.

I don't know this woman, I've never read her blog before this morning, and yet all I can do is hope to wolf down my cereal with Ruby so that we can have more 'down time' for her to color with her fantastic new crayons
(THANK YOU AUNTIE KAREN!)
and I can plop my eyes right back in front of this screen & find out what happens next.

Sometimes being a voyeur isn't such a bad thing...

or is it?

Sweater... or hat?

( you decide )

Vacation math:

-1 larger suitcase ( borrowed from yours truly)
to accomodate the 97lbs (LITERALLY)
of stuff (Ruby hand me up's) to haul back to NC: $0.00

-USAir's 'OVER WEIGHT LUGGAGE FEE': $60.00

-2 home canned jars of Aunt Allegra's applesauce
(probably what put her over the top weight wise): $0.00

-1 new hand knit pink 'Gwen Hat' for little miss Rock Star: $0.00

________________________________________________________

-Fantastic memories to hold dear in our hearts as well as watching our daughters play together, color together, dance together, be silly together, and just be sweet little girls together: PRICELESS!

________________________________________________________


Karen, thank you as always for a wonderful visit!

We love having you, after all...

... you're family.

Looking forward to PAJAMA NEW YEAR!

*hugs*

Love,

-Ah'MayMee & Roooby!

hehehehe

ps. To those of you with access to Gwen's blog, feel free to go check out all the pictures of our week together, pretty amazing moments. =)

oh & to Michelle & Julia, YOU GIRLS ROCK!
I'm SO GLAD we got a chance to meet & have fun together!
It's a bummer you live so far away but never forget... we'll always have RISOTTO!
*grin*
hehehe

Ruby & Bear...

...a love story.

Lunch just tastes better...

...with FRIENDS!

(LtoR: Gwen, Julia & Ruby)

Sharing...

... with my friend.

1 Momma + 1 Abbey =

1 FOREVER FAMILY!!

CONGRATULATIONS CHRISTI & ABBEY!

Seems to me you two are a
PERFECT FIT!

*smiles*

'Do Over'...

... that's what I wanted this morning, a DO OVER!
Where the hell's a time machine when you need one?
What happened, you ask?

My own little series of unfortunate events if you will...

Turn back the clock to 1992... I graduated top in my class at Essex Aggie Tech in Cosmetology.
Yeah for me, I was finally a hairdresser... something I had always loved & thought of doing but not until a rough patch in nannying (when you're a self employed nanny it's not always easy to find the next job when you need it...) so being faced with no job & not a backup plan in sight, I knew it was time to do something with my 'like' of 'playing with hair' and make it into a valid fallback, a sort of 'employment insurance plan'.

I worked professionally as a stylist for a while, mastering in cutting specifically, and loved it until I realized that I loved nannying more. I left haircutting & went back to my first true love, the children.
Oh, I still cut hair, just now not in a fancy schmancy salon,
but rather out of my humble yet cozy kitchen & now only here & there, not every day.

Now, that said- here's my morning.

I woke up, had my usual Ruby routine of giggles, new diaper, more giggles, breakfast, tea, smiles, vitamins, toast with 'peabarr', more tea, some milk to wash it all down & then a dose of silly time before getting down from the table with Bear in hand
to search out the toys for the day.

Great, Ruby's taken care of, every thing's status quo... time for a SHOWER!
*Oh, it's going to be a GLORIOUS day! I'm actually getting a SHOWER!*
(all you moms KNOW what I mean by that, no need to elaborate, period)

Anyhoo, so I'm in the shower & I realize how absolutely disgustingly LONG my hair is!
Then it occured to me that I hadn't had a haircut since BEFORE LEAVING FOR CHINA!
THAT WAS NEARLY A FREAKIN' YEAR AGO!
*unacceptable*

Man, before becoming a mother I made monthly appts for manicures, pedicures,
hair cuts & colors etc...
After becoming a mother?
(do I really need to get into why a day WITH a shower is a gift?)
LOL

So I was absolutely fed up with the long hair & upon getting out of the shower, grabbed my comb & shears & headed to my bedroom to sit in front of my mirror with my wastebasket in front of me.
I'm sure there's no need to go into detail as I'm guessing you can draw your own conclusions as to what happened next...

...and when it was over... my basket was full of a CRAP TON OF THICK HEAVY BLACK HAIR and I was sitting there wondering when exactly I had lost all my marbles?
(was it last Tuesday... maybe it was Wednesday?)

Immediately I picked up my cell & dialed my friend Alaina (a fellow graduate & stylist) and asked if she wouldn't mind coming over for a bit of damage control?

She giggled & said " you cut it yourself didn't you?" then didn't even wait for an answer cuz she knows, SHE'S BEEN THERE TOO! I think we (hairdressers) all have done it at one point or another.

So, tonight she came over, looked over the long layers I had given myself on the front & sides but not the back, why? CUZ I COULDN'T REACH THE DAMN BACK! lol
She did her damage control & you know what? BEST HAIRCUT EVER! Seriously,
I LOVE IT and could not be happier.
And the best part? She said that I had done a great job & if I could have reached the back properly, that I would not have needed her help at all.
That's a nice thing to hear but it certainly DOESN'T MEAN I'm going to be attempting the
'self shear' again anytime soon!
LOL

My hair is still long (remember it was obscenely long to begin with) so cutting a ton off really didn't make much of a difference... but I'm happy with it. It's cute & flouncy & bouncy and looks healthy & now I'm good for another year.
Cuz God KNOWS that will probably be when I have the time for the next cut. LOL

So, my 'DO OVER' turned out to be a 'MAKE OVER' in disguise!
=)

THANKS ALAINA!
(and no I don't have a photo to share just yet but I'm sure once Karen & Gwen arrive on Tuesday, we'll be taking a zillion pics so eventually you'll all see the doo)
For now, just use your imagination... and put my smiling face on it.
*grin*

A Fun Day!

This is Momma's friend Jason, I like him!
*Momma does too...*
"Hey Momma, why are you upside down?"

Here I am with Jason's kids, Jaxon (left) and Emma (right)...
... we thought we saw something out the window, turns out it was just Mr. Squirrel.

We had a VERY FUN DAY!
Momma says that our first meeting together was a major success!
*whatever that means*

COME OVER AGAIN SOON EMMA AND JAXON!
*you too Jason*
I HAD SO MUCH FUN!!!

XoXoXo

-Ruby Cate

The difference a year makes... *

... last year on this day,
Ebenezer was enjoying his long birthday walk around town.


This year, not so much...

... how sad my heart is today without my buddy by my side!

I miss you Ebby, always & forever!

Love,

-Momma

Happy 11th Birthday Buddy, I'm gonna sprinkle some hamburg
around your grave...
(I'm pretty sure the stray cat living under the shed will be happy to enjoy it on your behalf.)

*To all dog parents who read my blog... do me a favor today could you?
In honor of Ebenezer's birthday, give your fuzzy children an extra long, extra big hug would you? I'm here to tell you that you just never know how much time you have left with them & to cherrish every second you are blessed with their company. I miss Ebenezer like one would miss a limb. *tears*

Six months ago today...

...Momma lost her best friend,


and I lost my fuzzy brother.

I miss you Ebenezer, howling just isn't the same without you.

Momma said that tomorrow would've been your 11th birthday.
I'm sad that you won't be here with us but I promise
I will have a cheeseburger in your honor.
I love & miss you SO MUCH and so does Momma!

XoXoXo

-Ruby & Momma

Another BIG dream come true...

... in such a small little Tess!



CONGRATULATIONS TO OUR DEAR FRIEND JULIE ON THE REFERRAL OF HER BABY ANGEL, LITTLE TESS!

OMG COULD SHE BE ANY CUTER?!?!?!?!

Ruby can't stop staring at her picture, saying over & over:

"Momma, BABY! Awww (*kisses computer screen*) BABY, MOMMA!"

We could NOT be happier for you!!!!!!!!!!!!

WOOOOOO HOOOOOOOOO
WELCOME TESS!!!!!

C'mon Nonno...

... let's go for a walk.

C'mon Momma, quit monkey'in around...

...it's time to PEEL this BANANA stand,
& TRICK OR FREAKIN' TREAT ALREADY!!!

But, as long as you're making me sit here for pictures,
I might as well tell you that I like Uncle Steve's pumpkin the best!

HAPPY HALLOWEEN EVERYONE!

And now we interrupt this blog...

... to bring you a special message from our small red friend here.

This little fellow appeared suddenly this morning on my one and ONLY plant I have in the house. It's home to my China flag & how fitting to now be home to this little guy.
Perhaps this is a message to those of you waiting patiently for your referral?
Perhaps it's a 'good luck' send off to our dear friend Christi
who leaves tonight for CHINA!

Whatever the message, the pattern is that good things happen in 3's, right?
Well:
1. was on my plant
2. was on my living room window
3. arrived soon thereafter to join #2 on same window
&
4. thought that the kitchen window was more his style.

SO, 3 ladybugs & one for GOOD LUCK!
Here's hoping that everyone who is patiently waiting for their precious referrals or TA's will have prayers answered SOON!

Ruby & I send everyone our hugs & kisses!

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO
Hang in there!
(& if that gets too tedious, have yourself some HALLOWEEN CHOCOLATE!)

Mangia!

When you're Italian American of Chinese descent...

... you're a MASTER at eating noodles!

Even if it means you to do so one fist full at a time!


Oh yeah, that's right... get all in there little noodles!

What's up Momma, did I spill some ?

*grin*

WOOOOOO HOOOOOOOOOO
NOW THAT'S ITALIAN!!!

Little Miss Sleeping Beauty...

... my girl fell asleep in the car on the way home from the grocery store earlier.
We got into the driveway & her Nonno came out, scooped her up, brought her upstairs & gently laid her into her pack & play (where she usually naps...) and the kid stayed asleep the WHOLE TIME!

MY GIRL!
(oh, and Bear did good too, although I'm pretty sure it's him who's snoring...)

Sexy is as HUGH LAURIE DOES!

GOD BLESS SNL...

... DROOL!

Good Christ, as if I didn't already LUST after this man enough,
TONIGHT I see him NOT ONLY PLAYING ACOUSTIC GUITAR & HARMONICA SIMULTANEOUSLY
BUT DOING IT WHILST SINGING!
(can I say 'whilst' ?)
Aw hell, who knows, who cares! JUST GO WITH IT!
The man's British & they say all sorts of kewl shit, so I don't think he'd begrudge me a 'whilst' whilst in the midst of singing his PRAISES!
Let's just say that he gets my socks all in a ruffle!
(& that's saying something for a girl who NEVER wears SOCKS!)

*thud*

(somebody please call 911, I think I just fainted)

Everything's better in the dark!