Referral is MOVING!!

Ruby In Her Own Time...

Ok... was kind of a sleepless night last night, lots of tossing & turning but as of right now, 8:17am Wed August 31st, here is the status of my Referral as shown by DHL:

8-30-05 2:44pm REFERRAL picked up by DHL
1:58am Arrived at DHL facility in Beijing, China.
8-31-05 7:37am REFERRAL Departing Origin from Beijing, China.

China is exactly 12 hours ahead of us so currently it's 8:19pm there, wed night... which means that my Referral has been in Transit from Beijing for over 12 hours now! My guess is obviously that it's headed to San Fransisco & from there on to my Agency in WA & Kelli says it's due to be there by NO LATER than NOON on Sept 1st! OMG OMG OMG OMG I can only speculate. But, it's MOVING which is all I care about! =) OMG!!! I CAN'T BELIEVE IT AND I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE RUBY'S SWEET LITTLE FACE!!!!!!!!!!!! *tears*

More later as I find out more, but for now, it's my LAST DAY working for my babies. Tonight after work the parents are taking me & all three kids out to dinner to one of my FAVORITE PLACES EVER! The Beverly Depot! And you KNOW I'M GETTING LOBSTER! I'm also bringing my camcorder with me JUST IN CASE "the call" comes while we're eating, I want to be prepared! hehehe OMG, MY LAST DAY OF WORK, IT'S INSANE & SLIGHTLY SURREAL BUT IMAGINE IF RUBY'S PIC COMES TOMORROW, HOW FULL CIRCLE THIS WILL BE? Last day being a nanny to three of the most beautiful sweet children on the planet one day, and Mother to what I know will be THE MOST PRECIOUS LITTLE GIRL IN THE HISTORY OF LITTLE GIRLS EVER THE NEXT DAY! I am just so blessed, I have no words...
*smile*

REFERRAL'S ON IT'S WAY!!!!!!!!

Ruby In Her Own Time...


OMG I'M ON THE PHONE LIVE RIGHT NOW WITH KELLI AND SHE HAS LOCATED MY REFERRAL & IT PICKED UP IN CHINA THEIR TIME AUGUST 30TH AT 19:37 HRS OMG OMG OMG OMG Kelli says that it usually takes 2 business days so she approximates that it'll be here by thursday! OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YEAH KELLI!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Kelli is a fellow LEO BORN IN 72 she FRIGGEN ROCKS and has told me that she will PERSONALLY check it's status & EMAIL ME AS SHE FINDS OUT NEW INFO, HELLOOOOOOOOOO GIVE THAT GIRL A RAISE!!!!!!!!! =)

OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!

8-29-05

Ruby In Her Own Time...

I feel like I'm floating in slow motion towards the next two days... rumor has it that my referral is due either tomorrow or wednesday... I hear things like this & don't even know what to do with myself much less how to react. I'm having a small internal nervous breakdown & can't stop it to save my life! I just feel sick to my stomach with anticipation over the prospect of seeing my daughters face for the very first time! It's like giving birth, kinda... sure I didn't have to pass something the size of a watermelon out of a hole the size of a grapefruit but this process called Adoption, is my own personal labor & it lasted alot longer than just 9 months, try more like over a year & a half and it's still not even close to being over, just the next step is fast approaching & I am numb all over. I woke up this morning thinking wouldn't it be so nice if I had someone next to me in my bed, well... that wasn't the case, but soon, I'll have someone here, just in the next room and with a smile as bright as a rainbow & a heart as big as the moon, and love as pure sunshine. My daughter... OMG MY DAUGHTER! *tears* I need to go lay down & take all this in, all this time it's just been talk & anticipation, but now, within 48 hours ( give or take ) I'm going to see my angels face... learn all sorts of things about her and it will cement the whole thing as being REAL to me! So very very real to me... my Ruby Cate... I can't wait to see you baby! *smile*Momma loves you more than words can ever say!!!

8-28-05

Ruby In Her Own Time...

Magnetic Poetry Quotes

" I want to taste the moist flavor of his delicious kisses & feel the sweetness in how he touches me, I just dig him."

" Always capture raw pain as an instrument to give balance to your heart & when you experiment with passion the more absurd & beautiful the song will be."

" I must poke a hole in my body & suffer the drug through it's point of entry as it's filling me full of this tremendous difference, one I never asked for. With a sense of surreal death I approach the subject only to feel sad & dead every time. It makes me mad & empty at best. I could scream out wildly from deep within my healthy woman."

"As we lay there under the moon, your breath intoxicates my most private of thoughts..."

(more to come as they're created...)

8-28-05

Ruby In Her Own Time...

I'm exhausted... long day & it's time for my shot & straight to bed... but first I need to say this one thing: I am blessed beyond my wildest dreams... Ruby is to arrive any day now & when I see her picture for the first time, I will not only be looking at the face of my daughter, I will also be looking at the face of an ANGEL! I am tuly without words & hopelessly head over heels completely in LOVE! I can't wait...

G'night...

-Amy

8-28-05

Ruby In Her Own Time...

A new member of my family is here to stay... Peanut the frog is here & looks just like Tad did when Tad was a baby. Peanut is an albino african clawed underwater frog, only TEENIE TINY!! Peanut loves the home I made & is swimming around like crazy! I am sad that my Tad is no more but I really loved having a frog in the kitchen, especially at night cuz I could put the light on & it acted as a night light... so if it can't be Tad, it's nice that it can be Peanut. =) If I knew how to post pictures in this blog I'd post two... one of my Tad who I will never forget & one of my newest little friend Peanut. I know, I know... I'm a dorker, but I'm a happy dorker with a cute new frog. =)
hehehe

8-28-05

Ruby In Her Own Time...

Why is it that EVERY NIGHT I wake up out of a sound sleep from another vivid dream/nightmare? This is turning into a daily occurance now, which is NOT OK with me! But a whole hell of alot I can do about it right? The saddest thing is, when something bad happens & you go to sleep sad, once you are actually asleep, you kinda forget that the bad thing even happened & you're in a type of momentary lapse of reason, only to have that lapse PUNCHED out of you the MINUTE your eyes open & you are torn awake & sit upright in your bed only to then realize that yeah, big deal, you were dreaming & that dream you were just having, not real BUT that shitty thing that happens prior to you falling asleep to forget about it, STILL IS REALITY! UGH!!!!!!! I need a serious backrub with that funky backrubber thingie that I got at Bath & Body Works... That thing not only feels so amazing it literally gives me chills from the moment it touches my back & starts working it's theraputic magic. Alas, I have nobody here to do that for me & honestly, even if I did, it wouldn't be who I would really want here anyways so who cares, right? That too is pissing me off... why should I even care at this point? I really should be constantly telling myself that he is completely not worth all the aggrivation and that even if by some small chance he might be, he's certainly not worthy of anything I ever had hoped to give him, EVER! Actions speak louder than words and sadly, if we're going on actions, he's still stuck at 0. My friend from the other night gets serious points... he not only spoke to me some of the nicest things anyone's ever said to me, but SHOWED ME and it just was nice for a change. I'd take that feeling ANY DAY over the way mister nightmare made me feel. Ugh... gonna try to fall back to sleep now, wish me luck!

-Amy

8-27-05

Ruby In Her Own Time...

So, just finished up watching some tv & was about to head to bed & noticed as I passed Tad's tank that she wasn't really moving all that much, which normally doesn't bother me since she enjoys being a very lazy frog... but tonight, not so much. Tonight she wasn't so much lazy as she was dead. My poor frog, who I had saved from a teenie tiny tadpole is gone. =(
I know it's retarded, she was only a frog, but she was my frog... I will miss her. She was a product of the two frogs originally given to me by my buddy Erik... they had babies everywhere & of all the ones I tried to save, Tad (aka: Tad The Hopper) was the only one who had survived. I am sad for her but I know that I saved her & gave her a good life & a safe & happy home for all these years. I will miss her... goodbye Tad & hope there's lots of feeder fish for you to hunt in 'frog heaven'. =(

G'night.

8-27-05

Ruby In Her Own Time...

OMG MY BEST FRIEND IN THE WORLD JUST TOLD ME SHE'S PREGNANT!!!!!!!!!!!! HOLY CRAP I'M SO EXCITED & WAS CRYING CUZ I'M SO HAPPY FOR HER & ELVIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Her tentative due date is April 29th? We're waiting to see what the first ultrasound brings for news & then after that I'll keep everyone posted. I LOVE HER SO MUCH AND I'M SO HAPPY THAT WE'RE BOTH GOING TO BE MOTHERS WITHIN MONTHS OF EACH OTHER!!!!!!!!!! OH HAPPY DAY!!!!!!!!!!!!! =)

HEHEHE I'm so giddy I could just DANCE!!!!!!!!!

8-27-05

Ruby In Her Own Time...

What can I say... tonight was, in a word? Perfect It's 3:31am & I'm just now writing in my blog so you can imagine that I not only had a wonderful time spending my evening with him, but after dinner & drinks ( yes, I DRANK! can you even? I haven't had a drink since I was 25!) It was yummy too... pina colada! Anyway, after all that we went for a nice walk along the entire lengh of Long Beach in Gloucester. Literally all the way down to the end where it's so pitch black that you just lay back on the sand & stare up at the stars & are not only completely blown away by the beauty of it but at the same time, feel immediately insignifigant as a person because you're just a small blip on the map! My jeans were soaked from the ocean as we walked through puddles as the tide was coming back in and wherever denim is wet, STICKY SAND IS SURE TO FOLLOW! hehehe No biggie, that's what my washing machine is for right? So as if dinner, drinks, & the beach complete with shooting stars wasn't enough, we come back to my place & had the most amazing time just being together. Chatting... just out of this world. Thank you my dear sweet friend, you know who you are, and I love you for what you did for me tonight & how just when I think that nobody cares, you show me that yes, someone actually does care, and you SHOW IT! And you know too that I will always love you & be here for you, always. That is a promise. All I know is, I am a very very lucky girl, not just tonight, but always. You're the best... *hug*

-Amy

8-26-05

Ruby In Her Own Time...

Ok... so tonight is a big deal kinda, I'm going out tonight with someone I've cared for since last summer but we've always just been friends, which is great, I love his friendhip... however tonight I am just happy to spend some time with him alone. Dinner then off to the beach maybe, doesn't really matter at all to me what we do, just so long as we can be together for a bit. I can't get into much detail here because I don't want to jinx anything but let's just say that it's a night that I've been patiently waiting for for quite some time now. I've got a couple little things for him that I know he'll love & quite honestly, he deserves them. He's been a friend to me when others weren't there & he understands me & what I'm going through like nobody else can. I'm a lucky girl tonight.

-Amy

8-25-05

Ruby In Her Own Time...

Had a nice day today, went to Danvers to Cakes for Occasions to get a carrot cake to surprise Nick with. ( he told me it was his favorite) and then he arrived & we spent the day in Salem bouncing between the willows & pickering wharf. He met my friend Chip & we all shared some popcorn & it was nice. I don't much think that there will be a second date because for as much as we clicked online & on the phone, I think he was a bit intimidated by how outgoing & forward I was, also could've been his age, he is a tad bit younger than me. Still a great guy, very sweet & friendly, so I'm sure he'll find a nice girl to date soon enough. It was very nice to get out of the house & do something different for a change that's for sure. And it's always very nice to see my buddy Chip, I just love him to pieces.
So anyway, I'm home & packing my bag for tomorrow... going down to Brockton to see my friend Alyssa and my buddy Erik. Having a cookout at her house that I have yet to see, so it should be fun. She's got a pool too but I'm guessing that it probably won't be warm enough out tomorrow to swim but I'll bring my suit just to be on the safe side. I also went to Bath & Body works today & got myself another one of those FANTASTIC back massager thingies... LOVE IT! It's purple to match my bedroom. hehehe Oh, and they have an AMAZING new scent called Apple Torta OMG IT SMELLS LIKE FALL! LIKE APPLE CRISP & FALL LEAVES ALL ROLLED INTO ONE I LOVED IT SO MUCH I SLATHERED IT ALL OVER MY ARMS & MUST GO BACK TO ACTUALLY BUY ONE FOR MYSELF TO KEEP AT HOME! I love putting on lotion right out of a shower & do it every day without fail, but usually wear Angel Cake lotion, it smells yummy too but perhaps it's time for something new... and with Fall just around the corner, MY FAVORITE SEASON HANDS DOWN, it makes sense to smell like yummy things to eat for this time of year! I was actually thinking of bringing little individual size bottles of different scented lotions for all the Nanny's at Ruby's orphanage in China. It's customary to give little gifts to the women who help run the place & more importantly, the women who loved & cared for my darling daughter before I had the chance to. Well, it's shot night tonight & aside from waiting to see if my phone is perhaps going to ring by a cerTain friend... I'll probably just do my shot at 10pm & go to bed after that. Have a wonderful night everyone.

-Amy

8-25-05

Ruby In Her Own Time...

Today I met a new guy on American Singles... his name is Nick, he's 26 & from Quincy. Very handsome, very sweet & wonderful personality & voice. Spent quite a bit of time tonight on the phone together and he asked me out for lunch tomorrow so we'll see how it goes. I've touched up my haircolor so the black is shiny & new and I have a cute black silk top I'm going to wear with jeans. I'm sure that we'll have fun together, already we get along great on the phone, we watched most of the Red Sox game together while on our cell's ( we both have verizon so we're 'IN'... which is excellent~!) In one day I know his favorite ice cream, favorite food to eat, favorite food to cook, favorite month, favorite color & number... fav radio station etc... in other words, we didn't just sit on the phone & say things like " so... um... well...' we had actual conversations about real things & spent most of the time getting to know each other through questions, silly though they may have been, isn't that the way that 'getting to know you' gets off to a good start? Communication is KEY and so far, so good~! =)
It's nice to know that within a day, I can meet someone, get along with them, 'CLICK' to the point of arranging a date & meeting the very next day. It's refreshing to say the least. It's still completely early but I'll keep everyone posted on how it's going. He barely knows me but he still managed to text me 'goodnight' and then even said it on the phone after. What a change of pace from the recent norm. I guess sometimes prayers DO get answered...
G'night all, more tomorrow.

-Amy

8-23-05

Ruby In Her Own Time...

You know... sometimes it's hard to do the right thing. Tonight I told someone who I care a great deal for that it just wasn't going to work out. I wish with all my heart that that wasn't the case, but unfortunately it is. Right now, he's very self involved in his work, which is admirable on the one hand, but not what I am looking for at all, on the other. I don't like coming in second to someone's job, it's not who I am and I'm not in the habit of compromising myself for such things. I am true to who I am and what I need and it either works with someone, or it doesn't. I need attention from someone if it's going to work out, and frankly, I deserve it. I hope that he is happy in his life & I'll always wonder what could've been between us had he just stopped working long enough to see what it was I was offering him.
I'm sad for what I'll never have the pleasure of finding out, how it would've turned out... I guess I'll just have to be happy wondering from time to time & move on. I wish him luck in everything he does. G'night T...

-Amy

8-22-05

Ruby In Her Own Time...

Had a FANTASTIC DAY TODAY! Friends came over... Jen and Alyssa and Erik and Steve etc... we all hung in the pool & had a blast! Then went to Kitty O'shea's for dinner then over to Salem to putter around pickering warf & then it was off to the willows for some ice cream & to sit & enjoy ourselves on the docks! Not to mention that all night now I've smelled yummy from Erik's cologne after he hugged me over & over. =) hee hee LOVE MEN COLOGNE! I'm gonna have to ask him what it was cuz it's GOOD SCHTUFF! ;) So now I'm about to head to bed shortly & will probably spend tomorrow in the pool again with just Steve this time since Erik and Alyssa have to work, and Jen's going up to Maine with her hubby Elvis. =) ( Yes, that's REALLY her husbands name!)
OH, also got a wonderful SURPRISE package today from my friend Katherine in NJ! HOW SWEET THE THINGS SHE PUT INSIDE THAT BOX FOR MY LITTLE RUBY CATE! I LOVE GOODNIGHT MOON! and that little cloth book with the teether corners is ROCKIN'! Also loved the Panda Bear Purse... WAS SO SOFT I COULDN'T STOP TOUCHING IT ALL NIGHT! AND those STRAP BUDDIES FOR THE CAR SEAT! OMG PINK LADYBUGS AND DAISIES!!!!!!!! ARE YOU KIDDING!!!!!!!!! LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE ITTTTTTTTTTT!!!!!!!!!!! hehehe Her card was adorable & honestly I'm so lucky to have her as my friend! =) Thank you SO MUCH KATHERINE, YOU ROCK GIRL! *******HUGE HUG**********
ALSO Thanks to my sweet friend Alyssa, who... while we all walked in downtown beverly today, bought me the most ADORABLE LADYBUG PICTURE FRAME FOR RUBY'S ROOM THAT I'VE EVER SEEN! That frame is reserved for a picture of her holding my Ruby & that's that! =)
Well, gonna go talk to my friend Chris & then it's off to bed for me. G'night all...

-Amy

8-21-05

Ruby In Her Own Time...

Dad finally got Ruby's curtain rod up and I put her little valance on & it just looks SO DAMN CUTE! That ladybug rod is TO DIE FOR! hehehe My dad brought the changing table in as well & put it all together so now it just needs the changing pad & terry cloth covers ( which I registered for ) so I'll have to wait to get those a little later, no biggie. He also finally hung up my little Anne Geddes ladybug picture above her bureau so honestly, the only thing left that is missing IS MY BEAUTIFUL BABY GIRL! =) And speaking of my precious Ruby Cate, there's still no referral, but could be any day now, LITERALLY! So I will enjoy this vacation week off from work but will probably have, at all times glued to my side, my cell phone AND MY CAMCORDER! I will NOT miss the moment when I get 'THE CALL' no way no how! (Thanks Karen!!) hehehe
So tomorrow I'm having a bunch of friends over for the whole day to laze around in the pool & be silly and eat ice cream & talk about life & guys & sex & children & work & everything else in between! Gotta love days like that! Oh, also, the woman who I bought the ladybug curtain rod from (ebay) sent with it, this ADORABLE poem that I'd like to share here for all to read... it speaks VOLUMES... enjoy!

-Amy

'Take Time Mommy'

Take time to hold me on your lap,
To joke with me and make me laugh.
Take time, Mommy, this time will go so fast.

Take time to give me extra hugs,
To teach me a nursery rhyme or song,
Take time, Mommy, I won't be little for long.

Take time to tuck me into bed,
To read that story you know by heart.
Take time, Mommy, soon these days will part.

Take time to exclaim over what I color,
To admire the things I make from clay.
Take time, Mommy, I'm growing up and away.

Take time to imagine or make-believe,
To play some childish, silly game.
Take time, Mommy, soon it won't be the same.

Take time to let me help you work,
To teach me the many things you know.
Take time, Mommy, enjoy me as I grow.

-Julie O'Brien

8-20-05

Ruby In Her Own Time...

Great day today! Went to NH to my friend Lindsey's birthday party & her boyfriends brother Ryan was there & he works for the Red Sox AND HE WAS WEARING HIS WORLD SERIES RING! HE LET ME WEAR IT & I HAVE IT ON TAPE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OMG OMG OMG~! It was GORGEOUS!!!!!!!!!!! The party was a blast, Ryan was JUST ADORABLE and not only because he let me wear his RING, he was cute REGARDLESS! hehehe AND he's YOUNGER!! (only 23) BONUS! Anyone who knows me knows that I've always had a soft spot for younger men!!! hehehe *grin* Anyhoo... I'm home now, and I'm watching the video I took while there with my new camcorder. I seriously still gotta practice with it, a few times I had 'thought' I shut it off but really only shut the lens cap BUT KEPT RECORDING THE SOUND! Lovely. LOL hahaha MORE PRACTICE PLEASE! Gotta get this thing down before CHINA! Anyhoo... hope everyone reading this had a wonderful day & I'm gonna go relax & enjoy my night. I was supposed to have plans with someone tomorrow but have just now learned that he 'has to work'... shocker. Coming second to work all the time may not necessarily be something I can live with... understandably. Anyhoo, worry about that later, right now I'm still reeling from wearing A RED SOX WORLD SERIES RING! *HUGESMILE* And just adore Ryan! hehehe Roland, his brother, said he'd talk to him about me, so I'll keep you all posted. =) hehehe

-Amy

8-19-05

Ruby In Her Own Time...

I can't believe it's finally over, this week was a LONG one to say the least, but I love my babies so it's not really a big deal. Not to mention that this past week was my last 'full' week with them as their Nanny... Lacey starts when we get back, well... she'll do 'mornings' and I'll see my babies in the afternoons at least for August 29th, 30th and 31st... after that, I'm done. Lacey starts Sept 1st and I like he alot, she's a nice girl and the kids seem to like her as well, they picked her out themselves from all the applicants that answered Jen's ad in the paper, so that has to be a good sign. Kids can always tell when an adult is going to be a good decent person to be around & not creepy, ya know? So, my camcorder is wonderful, used it all day today to record my munchkins at a birthday party at the beach & it was a riot watching them try to 'fly kites'... honestly I wasn't much help myself since I'm useless in the Kite Flying Department. Sure they look pretty but who the HELL can keep one UP IN THE SKY FOR ANY EXTENDED PERIOD OF TIME ? SERIOUSLY? ugh... so I gave them all haircuts tonight & tomorrow they're off to 'STORY LAND' in NH, and are very excited! I know they'll have a great week & frankly I am excited at the prospect of doing NOTHING! Just relaxing with friends & family & hopefully a 'new man friend' soon, but we'll see. ( it's what he keeps saying to me so I figure I should use say it here as well...) He's adorable & friendly & sweet & kind... he loves his job which is a wonderful admirable quality to have and I just hope that he won't let me slip by the wayside should things progress, ya know? But again, we'll see... I know that he's got a good heart, because he worries about me sometimes. Asks if I remembered to take my shot, how am I feeling, am I ok or do I need to talk? etc... It's nice to know that someone other than myself is worried about my wellbeing. Strange, but nice. Well, as I sit here listening to the sounds of my sweet fuzzy son's snuffled snores I guess it's probably time for me to hit the hay. G'night everyone... G'night T, *smooch*. Thanks for, well... just thanks. Sometimes, when I really need it, you make me smile.

-Amy

8-19-05

Shapiro Family China Movie...

Ok... so if you want a good cry, check this movie out... OMG IT'S GONNA BE ME SOON I JUST CAN'T EVEN BELIEVE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *tears*

-Amy

8-18-05

Ruby In Her Own Time...

*yaaaaaaaawn* I'm sleepy tonight, it's 11:41pm and I need my rest. Had a long day, did my 'shot' and should be in bed sleeping before these side effects take hold of me & render me useless & FROZEN to the core! Got another long day tomorrow with my babies... they're coming here for their last 'friday with nanny' and are excited but once they get up from naps around 3 we have to head back to Marblehead for a birthday party on the beach for one of their little friends. I'd rather stay here but it's ok, it's my job so I'll take them & anyways, after tomorrow I have a week off PAID and then I only work mon,tues,wed ( 29,30,31st) & I'm officially unemployed/laid off etc. I'll be 'collecting' until the spring. It's time to be a Mommy first & then I'll go back to being a Nanny with Ruby at my side. =)

G'night for now, more tomorrow I'm sure...

-Amy