Saturday, October 15, 2005

Ignorance & stupidity are NO MATCH for LOVE...

Ok... my friend Karen GwenBlog is a wonderful friend who is now blessed to be Mother to the most beautiful little Gwendolyn I've ever seen! That said, her blog recently had a post in it with a link to a most disturbing article from this woman who apparently is lacking in the 'education' department. Below is that article, but I warn all about to read it, be prepared... ignorance & stupidity are clearly alive & well, at least in her cubicle...

Intolerance & stupidity: Alive & Well ...

After having read that I couldn't help but email her with my 2cents... ( ok maybe it was more like $1.00 worth) but it just HAD to be said!

"Most churchgoers congratulate a husband and wife who’ve just returned from China, complete with Asian baby girl in tow, an infant cut off from her family and culture. The Asian mother and extended family, subjected to a horrendous system that forces parents to abandon their baby girls, are hardly given a second thought. Nor do those who congratulate seem to consider the cruelty of forcing the traumatized baby into an extreme and permanent culture change."

You seem to have forgotten the most important factor in all of this, it's not our skin color, it's not who we decide to spend our lives with, it's not what clothes we wear or what religion we practice or how well we speak, it's LOVE. I am a Mother to a beautiful little girl from China, but first & foremost, she's from my heart. I spent the better part of the last two years doing everything in my power to see to it that a little girl without a home, without a mother, would soon have one, forever... a forever family. Sure I may not be asian, but I plan to educate not only my daughter but myself on her culture. I did not make the rules nor do I chose to live in a Communist country where yes, it's cruel that women are forced to have only one child, but keep in mind, that there IS the option of keeping their daughters... they CHOSE not to. They want sons to A. carry on the family name and B. care for them in their old age.
When I am holding my baby girl every night she will know that she has TWO mothers... one right here in America who loves her very much & would move heaven & earth for her, and one in China who loved her over the moon & back to be brave enough to place her in a location where she would be found & cared for until she found her FOREVER FAMILY. Ruby will know where she came from & how she came to be my daughter. I will not consider her my adopted child, but she is in every sense of the word, my daughter. She did not grow under my heart, but rather in it.
I have been a nanny now for over 15 years and am well educated in helping children adjust to new environments. I plan to do everything in my power to make Ruby's transition from Chinese life to American life as smooth as possible, after all, nothing worth having is had easily, it's worked hard for & earned... my child's future is no exception.
I pray every night, as I am a spiritual woman, and I pray not only for Ruby's safety & well being, but that of her Biological mother's as well. Don't you think for a second that myself & everyone in my life, family & friends, don't realize what a struggle it must've been for her birth mother to abandon her... I think of her birth mother every time I think of her. And not that it's any of your business but I am a single mother by choice, not a lesbian, not bisexual, but a straight woman who wanted to be a mother & could not JUSTIFY bringing another child into this world when there are SO MANY ALREADY HERE who need loving homes. There are many people who grow up normal without their birth parents, but rather loving adoptive parents who WANTED THEM very much. Just because people can have sex to make a life & give birth to a child DOES NOT MAKE THEM SUITABLE PARENTS every time, as statistics show. Those of us who CHOSE adoption did so out of LOVE, it's that simple. Also, I'm Italian American and continue to not only be PROUD to be an American but also EMBRACE my Italian heritage as well. Ruby will know THREE different cultures but the most important thing she'll learn is Love. Love, Tolerance, Patience, and Forgiveness. Forgiveness of those too ignorant to see her as a human being who was brought into love, rather than just an 'asian baby girl in tow' of her american parents. I feel sorry for you & hope that more people teach their children Tolerance & Forgiveness... It's a shame that clearly yours did not. Perhaps you should pray for that as well.

-Amy

For those of you who would like to also share your 2Cents with this woman, here is her email: trishcomicmom@earthlink.net

Enjoy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

How appallingly close-minded she is! I was shocked by her statements proclaiming that passing on genes make a mommy...and that those of us who adopt are just posing as parents. One point she never addresses is the FREE CHOICE of the millions of mothers worldwide who inconveniently get pregnant and either adopt, abandon or abuse thier children. Using her logic, those "mothers" are better for their children than loving adoptive homes - simply because they share genes!! One has to wonder if this woman is so blinded by whatever negatively impacted her childhood that she actually believes that it is better for hundreds of thousands of Chinese girls to languish in orphanages for years, with most either dying young or being turned out onto the streets at the age of 15 or 16 with little education and no support. Scary.

She paints a picture of a future without mothers. Ridiculous - what technology is providing is a way for woman who WANT to be mothers to do so, either through fertilzation, adoption or foster care. I wonder what she thinks about women who care for children out of love, and who provide thousands of homes throughout the US to kids whose own mothers have rejected and abused them?

Her point of view really boggles the mind.