Wednesday, March 29, 2006

Tail between my legs...


... you may have noticed the newest addition to 'Ruby In Her Own Time'... it's that little button over to your right. That little 'paypal donate' number that, despite much dismay from loved ones, I really felt I needed to add.
I have one week left of unemployment & then *poof* no more...
Scarey? That's an understatement...
I feel like a loser, I feel like I can't even provide for my daughter... but I know that when people want to help, it's foolish to turn them away. Because I know on more than one occasion I've been the one helping and I felt good to do it and felt happy knowing that my little gesture meant the world to the one on the receiving end.
Well, now I'm on that end and am scared to DEATH what I'm going to do, so... to those of you who emailed asking how you can help, wanting my home address to send money etc, and I turned you all down & said " no, I'll manage..", now I'm going to, with my tail between my legs, admit defeat, momentarially.
I guess it's silly to feel bad or like a failure about this because the truth of the matter is, when I was saving up for 'All things Adoption', I had friends & family saving change, and when I say change, I mean everything from just a pocket full all the way up to full out, hard core COFFEE CANS FULL of change. Trust me, it adds up.
I was amazed at the generosity I received, it made the whole process such a wonderful experience for me. As a single mother it was really the icing on my adoption cake because truth is, without that help and the help of my parents, I would NOT have made it to Ruby... I just wouldn't have.

I know that when I first blogged about being terrified about not finding a job, everyone in blogland emailed & those who knew my number, called & all of you wanted to help but I swallowed my pride & said thanks but I'll be fine.
I do believe I just felt something resurface... my pride again because I can't keep it swallowed forever.
So, for those of you who were so wonderful & generous & caring & sweet to want to help out, I now have a way for you to do so, should you still wish to.
I am humbled by this entire experience I'm going through, but I know that it will pass eventually because it can't last forever, nothing does.

But before I get in over my head, I figured I should at the very least, do this.
So, it's done.

And before even one person clicks on that button, I want to say an enormous;
THANK YOU
to anyone & everyone who finds it in their heart to help us out.

I know that when the day comes that Ruby and I are in a situation to be able to help someone else out, we will do so tenfold, as I'm a very generous woman by nature... just ask my family & friends.
Ok, now, my tail & I are going to go crawl under that rock...
...more later.

5 comments:

My Baby Ain't White said...

Untuck that tail and chin up...here's the thing: friends help friends. Period. Cannot wait to celebrate with you when you get back on your feet.

Much love,
Scott, Karen and Gwen

Samantha said...

I wish you the very best! I wish I could have given you more!

Unknown said...

Do not feel bad for a single second! You're a brave woman that is taking care of her daughter, plain and simple.
Hugs to you both...
Maryann

Karen and Jon said...

I don't know a person in this world that hasn't at some point needed a little help from those that care. I'm glad you gave us the opportunity to help out a little. Take care.

Anonymous said...

I wish you lived closer so we could solve this problem! Hang in there. We are waiting to play with you guys soon, Alison & Joely