Sunday, October 16, 2005

Isabella's homecoming...

















Ruby In Her Own Time...

Today my beautiful niece Isabella Grace came home to stay with her Mommy & Daddy and this proud AUNTIE could not be happier! =) Above are some pics of her wonderful arrival... complete with a surprise breakfast of french toast & bacon & coffee for the proud parents courtesy of Auntie Amy! =) Ebenezer was happy to stand watch over the food until we all sat down to eat. LOL ;)

Saturday, October 15, 2005

Ignorance & stupidity are NO MATCH for LOVE...

Ok... my friend Karen GwenBlog is a wonderful friend who is now blessed to be Mother to the most beautiful little Gwendolyn I've ever seen! That said, her blog recently had a post in it with a link to a most disturbing article from this woman who apparently is lacking in the 'education' department. Below is that article, but I warn all about to read it, be prepared... ignorance & stupidity are clearly alive & well, at least in her cubicle...

Intolerance & stupidity: Alive & Well ...

After having read that I couldn't help but email her with my 2cents... ( ok maybe it was more like $1.00 worth) but it just HAD to be said!

"Most churchgoers congratulate a husband and wife who’ve just returned from China, complete with Asian baby girl in tow, an infant cut off from her family and culture. The Asian mother and extended family, subjected to a horrendous system that forces parents to abandon their baby girls, are hardly given a second thought. Nor do those who congratulate seem to consider the cruelty of forcing the traumatized baby into an extreme and permanent culture change."

You seem to have forgotten the most important factor in all of this, it's not our skin color, it's not who we decide to spend our lives with, it's not what clothes we wear or what religion we practice or how well we speak, it's LOVE. I am a Mother to a beautiful little girl from China, but first & foremost, she's from my heart. I spent the better part of the last two years doing everything in my power to see to it that a little girl without a home, without a mother, would soon have one, forever... a forever family. Sure I may not be asian, but I plan to educate not only my daughter but myself on her culture. I did not make the rules nor do I chose to live in a Communist country where yes, it's cruel that women are forced to have only one child, but keep in mind, that there IS the option of keeping their daughters... they CHOSE not to. They want sons to A. carry on the family name and B. care for them in their old age.
When I am holding my baby girl every night she will know that she has TWO mothers... one right here in America who loves her very much & would move heaven & earth for her, and one in China who loved her over the moon & back to be brave enough to place her in a location where she would be found & cared for until she found her FOREVER FAMILY. Ruby will know where she came from & how she came to be my daughter. I will not consider her my adopted child, but she is in every sense of the word, my daughter. She did not grow under my heart, but rather in it.
I have been a nanny now for over 15 years and am well educated in helping children adjust to new environments. I plan to do everything in my power to make Ruby's transition from Chinese life to American life as smooth as possible, after all, nothing worth having is had easily, it's worked hard for & earned... my child's future is no exception.
I pray every night, as I am a spiritual woman, and I pray not only for Ruby's safety & well being, but that of her Biological mother's as well. Don't you think for a second that myself & everyone in my life, family & friends, don't realize what a struggle it must've been for her birth mother to abandon her... I think of her birth mother every time I think of her. And not that it's any of your business but I am a single mother by choice, not a lesbian, not bisexual, but a straight woman who wanted to be a mother & could not JUSTIFY bringing another child into this world when there are SO MANY ALREADY HERE who need loving homes. There are many people who grow up normal without their birth parents, but rather loving adoptive parents who WANTED THEM very much. Just because people can have sex to make a life & give birth to a child DOES NOT MAKE THEM SUITABLE PARENTS every time, as statistics show. Those of us who CHOSE adoption did so out of LOVE, it's that simple. Also, I'm Italian American and continue to not only be PROUD to be an American but also EMBRACE my Italian heritage as well. Ruby will know THREE different cultures but the most important thing she'll learn is Love. Love, Tolerance, Patience, and Forgiveness. Forgiveness of those too ignorant to see her as a human being who was brought into love, rather than just an 'asian baby girl in tow' of her american parents. I feel sorry for you & hope that more people teach their children Tolerance & Forgiveness... It's a shame that clearly yours did not. Perhaps you should pray for that as well.

-Amy

For those of you who would like to also share your 2Cents with this woman, here is her email: trishcomicmom@earthlink.net

Enjoy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Friday, October 14, 2005

FIRM TRAVEL ARRANGEMENTS!!!






JUST GOT OFF THE PHONE WITH LINDA WANG FROM MY AGENCY & HERE ARE MY FIRM TRAVEL DATES!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GREAT PRICE ON THE TICKETS TOO!!! Per round trip ticket it was: $1,047.32 each! NOT BAD!!! =)

LEAVE FOR CHINA WED NOV 16TH, 2005

Northwest Airlines

Depart Boston: 8:45am 16th
Arrive Detroit 10:57am 16th

Depart Detroit: 1:45pm 16th
Arrive Tokyo: 5:10pm 17th (China is 12 hours ahead of us)

Depart Tokyo: 6:00pm 17th
Arrive Beijing: 9:15pm 17th


Coming Home Nov 30th, 2005


Depart Guangzhou: 8:30am
Arrive Tokyo: 1:40pm

Depart Tokyo: 3:45pm
Arrive Detroit: 1:20pm

Depart Detroit: 5:05pm
Arrive Boston: 6:56pm

OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IT'S GETTING SO REAL NOW~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Silence & Cake...

Ahhhhhhhh soooooo nice... my apartment is peaceful & quiet except for the sound of Ebenezer's breathing as his nose is stuffed out the bottom opening of the window. (he loves the fresh crisp fall air) My ceiling fan is on & I have a little set of wind chimes that sounds quite similar to 'pixie dust' being sprinkled everywhere, so it's just such a nice thing to be here alone & enjoy this quiet, and it just occured to me... soon, quiet will be a rare occurance. Don't get me wrong, I am SO READY for Ruby to be here with me for the rest of forever, but these moments of quiet time are going to be but a faint memory, soon to be replaced by fun loud silly times with my beautiful baby girl... stories at all hours of the night if she can't sleep, fancy dress up tea parties with me & all her stuffed animal friends, songs sung much too high, much too loud and always off key, but songs sung between mother & daughter, so they'll be perfect in every way. You know, it just occured to me that every good tea party has one key element... THE CAKE! So I just put two small white cakes into the oven to bake & will properly ice them later with icing that I will make from scratch & maybe I'll even decorate them all fancy since I have all the tools to do so & more importantly, KNOW HOW since taking that cake decorating class!!! I'll decorate one for Ruby & one for Isabella... who knows, if they come out looking adorable I'll take pics & post them here for all to see, if they come out like CRAP, I'll cut them, eat them with my tea & take a picture of my empty plate!!! hahaha All I know is pretty soon my house is going to smell AMAZING and that's a good thing! Well, I must 'off' now, I have a phone call to get to... later!

-Amy

Thursday, October 13, 2005

A picture's worth a thousand words...


... So, what thousand words come to mind when you see THIS picture? ;)
Sorry, just feeling saucy tonight! hehehe

Wednesday, October 12, 2005

PS...




PS. Ok, so I know there's only so many pictures you can see of a newborn, but when it's your little brother who is the father of this amazing new life & you have fond memories of 'said daddy' eating MUD PIES & being an all around STINKER as kids... to see a moment like this, it makes you proud to be his big sister... I love you Adam.

Proud Auntie holding Isabella for the 1ST TIME!!!




Ok, so my niece is a lil'stinker... last night I stayed at the hospital RIGHT UP UNTIL 10PM and do you know that THAT LITTLE WEASEL DECIDED TO MAKE HER APPEARENCE ONLY 14 MINUTES AFTER I LEFT?!@$#%^$ Ok, so I went today & she and I had a nice long 'Auntie & Isabella' chat... I don't think she'll remember most of it but I plan on having it again someday when she's old enough to actually respond! ;) But, she's SO GOSH DARN CUTE that I couldn't resist posting more pics of her tonight... ENJOY EVERYONE! THIS AUNTIE IS IN LOVE!

-Amy

Isabella Grace...








Ruby In Her Own Time...
Announcing MY NIECE ISABELLA GRACE!!!

Born: October 11th, 2005
Time: 10:14pm
Length: 19 inches
Weight: 7 lbs 1 oz
C-Section

Tuesday, October 11, 2005

CAN WE SAY TA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ruby In Her Own Time...
WOOOOOOOOOOOOO HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Below is a letter I received in my email just now after having spent HOURS at the hospital waiting for my niece to be born, and so far, nothing yet but obviously I'll be sure to post an announcement here & pics as well but for RIGHT NOW, the GOOD NEWS IS I HAVE TRAVEL APPROVAL AND A CONSULATE DATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Here's the letter:

Dear families,

Your patience has been greatly appreciated as we awaited travel approval. We received travel approvals and have a confirmed Consulate appt. for each of you.

Our Faith associate Eric called the Consulate last night and was able to secure the earliest date possible. Your Consulate appts. will be on Monday, Nov. 28, 2005 at 10:30am. The Consulate initially told Eric they had nothing in November and it would be December, but as some of you have fingerprint expirations in early Dec. he was able to convince them to take you on the 28. I know it may be a few weeks longer than you were hoping but it was the very earliest date we could secure.

For families whose fingerprint expire after Nov 29, 2005 you do not need to be re-printed at this time.

As far as travel is concerned this means you will most likely depart for China on one of the following dates:

If you are traveling to Beijing for the short 2 day tour you will most likely depart on Wed. Nov 16.
If you are not adding Beijing you will most likely depart on Friday, Nov 18.

You will most likely fly out of Guangzhou on Wed. Nov. 30. Your child's visa will be ready at 4pm on Tuesday, Nov 29.

I say most likely because of flight availability, please know this is a typical schedule and dates can vary sometimes.

Linda will need a day or two to research flight availibility before she calls you to discuss your options. Please give her a few days to organize your group so she is not flooded with calls before she has a chance to look into flights.

I know this is welcome news for you all, we look forward to organizing your travel and talking with you in the next few days.

Have a wonderful evening!

MY NIECE IS ON HER WAY!!!





(The above is chinese characters for 'Isabella' (top) and 'Grace' (bottom) hehehe
My brother woke up this morning to a very pregnant wife with very big contractions approx 2 min's apart, so off to the hospital they went & I'm about to go join them!!! BABY ISABELLA GRACE IS ON HER WAY TODAY & I FINALLY GET TO BE AN AUNTIE TO MY BROTHER'S CHILD!!!!!!!!! Took the boy only 30 years but here we go!!! ISABELLA GRACE AUNTIE CAN'T WAIT TO MEET YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sunday, October 09, 2005

OVER THE MOON IN LOVE!!!

Ruby In Her Own Time...



I have NO CHOICE but to post these precious pictures one more time...
I am simply OVER THE MOON IN LOVE with this beautiful little girl that my heart's about to SERIOUSLY BURST!!!

Saturday, October 08, 2005

Topsfield Fair w/a slight chance of RAIN!


Ruby In Her Own Time...



Ok, so I went to the Topsfield Fair today, a yearly event that everyone local to the north shore religiously attends regardless of weather, myself no exception. I went with my friend Ben & we had fun until we realized that we were clearly more soaked walking around that fair than we would've been had we just gotten out of a shower! So, since the rides weren't open & the games weren't open, we just puttered around the rest of the events & the Trade Building where I bought some gifts for friends & Ruby as well. I got some apple cider to bring home & some cider donuts & a few T shirts etc. Nothing fancy but still a good time regardless of the rain. I am happy however to be home & dry & toasty now. Ben is gonna crash here tonight & watch a movie & I'll probably read more in my book & chat online until it's time for bed.

Still no word on TA yet but hopefully this coming week since last week China had the whole week off for Holiday. *keep your fingers crossed for me k?*

That's all for now, more later!!

-Amy

Friday, October 07, 2005

Out of the mouths of babes...

When is it that we as adults lost that ability to be painfully honest & just say what we were thinking without worrying about what that was exactly? Somewhere along the line we decided that it was better to sugar coat things & tell half-truths to spare feelings & make those around you content. I just don't get it... there's something to be learned through the innocence of kids, it's a pure sort of honesty that you can't get mad at regardless of the words that come out. Things that pure are beautiful in every way, period.


WHY GOD MADE MOMS
Answers given by 2nd grade school children.

Why did God make mothers?
1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
2. Mostly to clean the house.
3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.

How did God make mothers?
1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He Just used biggerparts.

What ingredients are mothers made of?
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice inthe world and one dab of mean.
2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.

Why did God give you your mother and not some other Mom?
1. We're related.
2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me.

What kind of little girl was your Mom?
1. My Mom has always been my Mom and none of that other stuff.
2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be prettybossy.
3. They say she used to be nice.

What did Mom need to know about Dad before she married him?
1. His last name.
2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunkon beer?
3. Does he make at least $800 a year?
4. Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?

Why did your Mom marry your Dad?
1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot.
2. She got too old to do anything else with him.
3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on.

Who's the boss at your house?
1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because Dad's such a goofball.
2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than Dad.

What's the difference between Moms and Dads?
1. Moms work at work and work at home, & Dads just go to work at work.
2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
3 . Dads are taller & stronger, but Moms have all the real power 'causethat's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's.
4. Moms have magic since they make you feel better without medicine.

What does your Mom do in her spare time?
1. Mothers don't do spare time.
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.

What would it take to make your Mom perfect?
1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue.

If you could change one thing about your Mom, what would it be?
1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get ridof that.
2. I'd make my Mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.
3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on her backof her head.

PRICELESS!!!

Thursday, October 06, 2005

GOD GRANT ME STRENGTH...



Ruby In Her Own Time...

Ok, it's thursday, I've been here since sunday night and I am EXHAUSTED! Physically, mentally, emotionally, you name it! In all my 15 years of being a nanny to many different types of children I have never ONCE encountered what I'm dealing with here... the money I'm making this week is nice but trust me, I earned that the second day after finding the younger of the two playing in his own shit on the bedroom floor's WHITE CARPET... it gets worse but I won't frighten any of you with the details. I'm spent, worn out, exhausted, dizzy and need to go HOME. Tomorrow WILL NOT COME FAST ENOUGH! I love being a Nanny, it's my reason for being on this planet, HOWEVER... note to self, even the BEST MOST LOVED JOBS have HUGE SPEED BUMPS EVENTUALLY, EVEN AFTER 15 YEARS OF WONDERFUL CHILDREN, there is bound to be the 'shitartist' in the group... I have encountered mine. This same child who'se artistic ability is curently limited to 'shit' as it's medium, is also very skilled at kicking, screaming, biting and basically 'melting down' like his life is about to come to a crashing hault. I have had to muster up EVER LAST OUNCE OF KNOWLEDGE & EXPERIENCE & NANNY LOVE TACTICS to handle said child & seriously, if tomrrow wasn't friday, I'd be throwing myself in front of a BUS!

I did this as a favor to my old boss... whose kids were a DREAM compared to the two I'm watching now. ( these boys are their cousins ) I did the favor for two reasons...1. I saw a desperate mother in need of some help & me on my high' nanny horse' knew that I'd be perfect for the job & to help her out in a pinch as it's not always an available opportunity but just so happened to work out that way, so I agreed to help her... and 2. because the money will help me while in China.
If I could go back & change my mind about this week, trust me I would in a heart beat, but life doesn't work that way. I've made my decision, my 'bed' if you will, and I'll continue to suck it up & lie in 'said' bed until TOMORROW but trust me, the minute I"m free to go, you'll be able to see the SMOKE TRAIL FROM MY EXHAUST FROM WHATEVER STATE IT IS YOU LIVE IN!

No more nannying unti next year, this 'soon to be mom' NEEDS A BREAK until it's time to get on a plane & go get my Ruby Cate. I will be USELESS to her if I do anything other than that.

I love you Ruby, Momma promises to just relax & be fully recharged when I see your sweet face & those amazing cheeks for the first time in China!

XOXOXOXOXO

-Momma

(who is more tired than I ever thought I could be)

ps. On a side note... Stress is NOT conducive to a healthy lifestyle when one is living with MS... the moral of this story? Never EVER Nanny for someone as a 'favor' again if you don't first KNOW THE CHILDREN WELL ENOUGH BEFORE HAND TO KNOW THAT THEY'RE NOT GOING TO SEND YOU OVER THE PERVERBIAL EDGE!

Monday, October 03, 2005

Amy's Apple Crisp...

Ruby In Her Own Time...

Amy's Apple Crisp

8-12 apples, peeled & sliced
1 cup flour
1/2 cup brown sugar
1/2 cup granulated sugar
1 stick softened butter
1 tsp allspice
2 tsp ground cinnamon
1 cup Simply Granola snack crunch with raisins ( or 4 to 5 packets of any instant flavor oatmeal with raisins or almonds or whatever type is your favorite)

Preheat oven to 375
Generously butter the bottom & sides of a large rectangular pyrex glass baker, & set to the side.
Peel & cut into slices the apples & spread around the bottom of pyrex baker spreading out evenly.
Mix remaining dry ingredients in a large bowl & then add the softened butter & mix with hands until all crumbly.
Crumble mixture all over the top of the sliced apples & make sure to cover the apples well.
Bake at 375 for 35 to 40 min.

Serve warm with either whipped cream or (my favorite) vanilla ice cream on top!

ENJOY!!!


I post this recipe because as we speak I have one in the oven for the boys & their father tonight. We tried to go apple picking this morning, got lost on our way to amesbury & ended up just buying some fresh apples at Tendercrop farms in newbury & making the crisp all together here at home. Both Henry & Holden are very good helpers & wonderful BAKERS! =)

More later. =)

-Me

Sunday, October 02, 2005

Off to Newbury, MA for the week...

Ruby In Her Own Time...

So I'm off to Newbury, MA for the week, I leave tonight & spend the week until friday & come back home friday night. I'm doing a favor for someone close to my kid's family. Emma, Abi (both 4 today HAPPY BIRTHDAY GIRLS!!!) & Sam (2 1/2) have two cousins, Henry (5) & Holden (2), and their mother had to recently fire her newly hired Nanny for fear that her children were in physical danger, SO, that said, and me being unemployed at the moment, I was happy to offer to help out in a pinch. They have a beautiful house & a gorgeous guest room and it's right down the street from Tendercrop Farm!! (Best sugar cookies on the PLANET!) I will try to blog from there at little bit & I do have access to a 'guest' computer but I'll be busy most of the time with the boys as we have lots of fun things planned to do, like carve pumpkins, go to the petting zoo, read a ton of books & other things like that. I will log on every night to check email obviously but my blogging may not be every night like I'm used to doing. You all know how to reach me, and if you don't, here's my email: mom4ruby@yahoo.com and my cell will be with me the whole week so feel free to call & say hi! =)

I hope that my TA arrives soon, maybe this week while I'm busy so I don't have time to wonder if this day is the day or this day is the day, I'll just keep busy & get the TA call & be surprised & happy, that's the plan. =)

Blog soon, everyone have a great week!

-Amy

Saturday, October 01, 2005

Ok so I'm crazy...

Ruby In Her Own Time...

I'm un-officially packed for China. I just finished putting the last of my things in my suitcase, both mine & Ruby's and I did what my agency said to do: When I think I've packed as little as I can pack, open up the luggage & take half out cuz I won't need it. I did that TWICE! And now I'm finally done, because quite honestly if I take one more thing out of there I'm gonna be bummin once in China. Below is pretty much what I have managed to put into one suitcase...

Amy: one pair of jeans packed one I'll wear onto the plane, 8 pairs underwear (9 if you count the pair I'll wear that day), 1 bra packed, one I'll wear on the plane, various T shirts all different colors & two fancy tops for official appointments while in China. I'll wear my Merrel's (shoes) on the plane & they're the only pair I'm bringing, 1 black bathingsuit and one black zip up hooded light cotton jacket I'll wear over.
For Ruby I have: 2 playtex bottles with brand new pack of liners(over 150 of them) & extra nipples, 2 sippy cups, 2 travel temp sensative spoons in their own little carrying case, gerber liquilyte powder packs for making by the bottle/sippy full, A TON OF THEM! ( Thanks Karen for the advice ) 2 1lb containers of soy formula with iron (pediatrician recommended) a SHITLOAD of diapers & a brand new package of wipes, 1 toasty soft blanket, 2 small toys for her to play with, gerber fruit/veggie puffs 6 containers of assorted flavors, two pairs of 12mo. jeans assorted cute tops, her OFFICIAL RED SOX JERSEY, 1 pair of shoes & 1 pair of sandals, lots of colored socks like maybe a dozen of them, 2 pairs of tights ( one heavy & one light) 2 fancy dresses for official appointments while in China, dozen white onsies, dozen cute hair ribbon clips in every color under the sun for that beautiful head of hair she's got, and three different hand knit sweaters to wear if it's chilly, they look more like cardigans & aren't over the head types, TONS of infant medication 'just in case', shampoo & 'no more tangles' spray, a comb & a brush, etc...

Carry on: a book to read, my cell phone, my glasses case, my important 'info & documents', my camcorder & accessories, outlet converter for China, pen & journal for writing in & 'mommy drugs' for MS & motion sickness, CAN'T WAIT!

I'm curious though, for those of you reading this who've already traveled, is there a weight limit to your luggage & if so, what is it & what is the cost per pound if you go over? My mother seems to think there's a 40lb limit to each persons luggage & mine currently weighs 55lbs. Christ they're gonna think I've got a dead body in there, AND KEEP IN MIND THIS IS AFTER I TOOK HALF OF IT OUT!! Everything in there I MUST bring & I'm nervous to remove one more thing from that luggage for fear of not having what I need while there. Two & a half weeks is a long time to be away from the 'comforts of home' so as long as I have 'Ruby comforts' I'll feel ok!

Anyhoo, I gotta go visit my friend & Travel mate, Ronayne to go over trip stuff so I'll post more later... any ideas as to things I may have missed or things I could do without, please by all means, FEEL FREE TO COMMENT & SHARE YOUR WISDOM! ;)

Thanks!!!!!!!

-Amy

CHINA HERE I COME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Top 5 things I HATE about having MS...

1. Having it at all... I could've gotten measels or mumps or mono but NO I get MS... fun fun fun.
2. All the shots... 3x a week for the rest of forever... forever is a pretty long time, don'tcha think?
3. Sudden hot & cold spells, like right now as I type this I feel like I'm frozen solid & it's barely begun Fall weather, which is my FAVORITE!Plus I just HATE being cold.
4. No more Hot tubs or Sauna's/steam rooms etc... not that I was in them on a regular basis but once in a while it's nice to hop into my friends thermospa... not so much anymore.
5. The uncertainty of this disease... one day I'm fine, the next I feel useless... I know it's similar to 'real life' but it's kinda like 'real life' with a great big headache that, no matter how much tylenol or excedrin you take, it never completely goes away & you KNOW it'll always come back eventually.

I know it's retarded for me to use my blog as a public bitching 'soap box' but tonight, it's just how I feel. Sorry everyone...

Pray for a fast TA (Travel Approval) so I can get my ass on a plane & finally hold my baby girl in my arms & never NEVER let her go!

G'night...

Thursday, September 29, 2005

Before bed thoughts...



Ruby In Her Own Time...

Life is a funny thing... things happen that you didn't expect nor ask for, yet they still happen & you find yourself coming face to face with challenges that you'd rather not have to deal with. But the reality is, sometimes you don't have a damn choice, so you deal. The question is, do you just do the least amount of 'dealing' to just get the shit over with & forgotten, OR... do you actually take the time to meet the challenge head on & deal with it in the appropriate way, regardless of it's difficulty level? See, I believe that it's these tough times, the ones we would rather run from but make ourselves stand up to, that make us who we our. It's our mistakes that we learn from that help build character... give us a sense of pride, of belonging. It's never easy to do what's right, we all know that the easy way out is always the 'wrong' way but it's what we usually think of first before we're faced with that inevitable 'line' where we either buck up & face the music OR bow out & run with our tail between our legs. I've always been one to face shit head on... maybe not right away, sometimes I'll admit that it takes a few test runs for me to get my engine revved up enough to do right by my convictions, but in the end I always do what's right, however hard it may be at the time.
My wish for Ruby is that she too will grow to have integrity, honor, pride, and a feeling of belonging to something more than just herself... something more than just her bedroom in this apartment in this house in Beverly. I hope she sees the world for the 'bigger picture' that it is & embraces all that it has to offer her. I hope she grows up to be a decent & kind human being who is selfless in her actions & kind in her words. If I do my job as her mother right, she'll be all those things & more, and I... I will be the most proud mother on the planet. I already am, because my little girl is a fighter. From being born to a biological mother who loved her enough to know that the better path for her to take would be one other than with her, to being found at 2 days old on the front entrance of a salvage center, to finding her way, over the next year of her life, into my heart & into my family. I am blessed, I am loved and so is my little girl. Every mistake I've ever made, ever bump in the road led me to where I currently stand. Past situations that broke my heart, they were just northern stars pointing to where I needed to be, and that's right here. Completely in love with a little girl I've never had the pleasure of holding or hugging or kissing, but that's all about to change soon. Ruby, if I promise you one thing in this life, it is that you will know you are loved. Always & forever, pure & honest, lasting & selfless, love that spans the globe even as I type this, my little girl, my beautiful birthday princess, Momma loves you and can't imagine my world without you in it. I am coming soon my love... very soon.

-Momma
xoxoxoxoxo

Shower Pictures...

Ruby In Her Own Time...

Scroll down for pictures of my shower FINALLY! Rather than add them to a new post, I just edited my original "Baby Shower Sunday" post & put them there... enjoy! =)

-Me

Wednesday, September 28, 2005

Morning tea & sugar cookies...

MMMMMMMMMMmmmmmmmm Man do I love BLACK TEA!!!!!!!! Nothing better on a cool fall morning than a big steaming cup of my PG Tips tea & a big round sugar cookie from SCRATCH! Well, not from my kitchen mind you, from this fantastic place in Newbury called 'Tendercrop Farm'... OMG SO GOOD! I bought sugar cookies for myself, oatmeal raisin for my parents & chocolate chip for my brother & his very pregnant wife. Ebenezer is sitting at the foot of my bed, STARING at my cookie thinking " save me the last bite Momma... " I always do & he knows it! ;)
So, monday my sister inlaw & I went out shopping, had to return a few things to BabiesRus and get some things that I still needed for my upcoming trip. We also went to this little store in Danvers called 'The Learning Tree' and who should I run into but my 2nd grade teacher, MRS. BROWN! I nearly fell OVER! She remembered me immediately & asked about Adam as well, it was funny. She's a wonderful lady & was THRILLED to learn about Ruby ! I bought some books while there & also bought more books earlier in the day at Barnes & Noble MAN I LOVE BOOKS! Ruby's room is PACKED with books and I plan to read to her all the time! Hell, as it is I go in there at night & curl up on the floor with Ebenezer & read them to him. =) I don't know how much of it he understands but I DO know that he loves the time that we spend cuddling, regardless if I'm reading something out loud or not, he just knows that it's 'special' time just for him & his Momma. =)
Well, as far as my China goes, I'm still waiting on my TA to arrive, and it'll get here when it gets here. If there's one thing I've learned through this adoption process, it's that my Ruby does things 'IN HER OWN TIME' for sure, so it'll get here when it gets here & not a minute sooner. I can live with that. She waited until her birthday to show me her precious face & I wouldn't have wanted it any other way, I just am happy, bottom line.

I'm gonna go shower & head out to do a few errands but I'll blog more later I'm sure. Everyone have a great day!

-Me

Monday, September 26, 2005

Baby Shower Sunday...

Ruby In Her Own Time...

Today was my Baby Shower 'Brunch' at the Beverly Depot. Great restaurant & lovely brunch. Tons, and I mean TONS of people showed up and a good time was had by all. I got lots of nice things to take with me to China for my sweet little Ruby Cate. I'm exhausted so you'll forgive me if I don't write more than that for now... Thanks to everyone who came today and thank you most of all to my parents who threw the shower, I love you both & so will Ruby with all her heart.
*hugs*

G'night.

-Amy

PS: Here are some pics from the shower... I finally was able to get them uploaded here so for those of you who didn't receive any via email, enjoy! =) Oh, and the children are all mostly kids I've nannied for in the past or nieces & nephews. And that gorgeous quilt was hand made by my very talented friend Emily with the quilt squares from my 'adoption group friends' when we did the 100 wishes quilt. I think it came out beautiful, just like I wanted it, random squares & it's PERFECT!!!!!!! THANKS EMILY!!!








Saturday, September 24, 2005

Ruby's Finding Ad!!!



Ruby In Her Own Time...

Today, my daughter's 'Finding Ad' arrived in the mail & MAN IS SHE ADORABLE AT 3 MONTHS OLD!!! hee hee It's the earliest known pic I have access to of my sweet little girl & I am happy to share it with everyone. For those of you interested in possibly obtaining your child's finding ad, please contact:

Research-China.Org

Brian is amazing & what he can do is just priceless! Without his help I would never have been given such a gift as a photo of my baby girl at only 3 mos old! ROCK ON BRIAN!!! =)




Blurred Vision & the Love of a Lion...


Ruby In Her Own Time...

So, technically I guess it's caused by my MS but sometimes I have these moments when my vision is completely blurred to the point where even having my glasses on doesn't seem to help much. ( Excellent news for local drivers in Beverly right? LOL ) It occured to me tonight that what we can't see with our eyes, we can always see with our hearts... now granted my heart wasn't given a licence to drive, my eyes had far more to do with that than my heart did but if we need a licence to drive a car & one to get married & one to operate heavy machinery... why is it that nobody needs a licence to care for someone else's heart? It's such a monumental responsibility & so many people just carelessly take it for granted... it's sad. Why is it that it's easier to get hurt by someone than it is to be loved by them? Life is funny that way... someday someone is going to prove me wrong & give me everything that I've ever wanted or needed in a lover/boyfriend/friend etc but until then it's me, myself & I against the world & tonight I'm just tired of being a one woman team. I have to say though that I am so blessed to have the friends in my life that I have... one tonight in particular who just made me feel like the only woman on earth & not only the only woman, but the most beautiful one, and that, without a doubt, is just amazing & I love him so much for what he just did for me. You know, for his age one would assume that he's just a kid & has alot of living to do, but to be honest, he's more mature & more wise than most of the men I know in their 30's. He's an old soul who is wise beyond his years & how blessed I am to have him in my life. He's strong & wise, just like a lion... and he's my lion, and oh how I'm the lucky one to have the love of a lion. *HUGS* I love you my sweet strong lion, never change.

-Amy

Thursday, September 22, 2005

Late night conversations with a friend & 'True Love' ...

Ruby In Her Own Time...

... I love him, he knows I do, I just told him I loved him... not the 'in love with him' kind of love, not yet anyway... but the kind that makes you smile when you think of that person & just know deep down that you're blessed to have them in your life. That kind of love.
He is special to me in a way that nobody else ever has been. He fills arole for me that nobody else ever could even if they wanted to because you can't make that type of connection happen, it does because it's destined to. Just like I didn't ask to one day have MS... I just got it. Same thing, nobody asks for certain things in their life to happen, but when they do, embrace them for what they are & try your best to be a good & decent human being in the process. Because it's not what we are faced with in this life that matters, no... it's how we deal with those things that makes us who we are. My MS doesn't define me... on the contrary, it's who I've become since that diagnosis that speaks volumes & it's the reason why I know I'm going to be one hell of a mother to my beautiful little girl Ruby. Her life will be filled with many ups & downs, challenges that at the time may seem impossible to deal with, but as her mother, I'm here to not only tell her but SHOW HER that ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE and just when you think you don't have anything left to give, that you can't POSSIBLY go another step, you find the strength in the deepest parts of your soul to put just one more foot in front of the other & soldier on. My girl is already a fighter, she's lived through more in her first little year of life than I have in 33. My girl is going to continue to be strong, to be brave, to know that no matter what life throws her way, she'll get through it, but once she's in my arms, I want her to know that from that day forward, she doesn't have to go through it alone... I will always be there right by her side. I love you my sweet little Pei Pei girl. Momma is counting the days till I receive TA & can get my toosh on a plane to come to China to wrap my arms around you, right where I belong!That is the most pure & wonderful form of 'TRUE LOVE' that I have ever experienced... I love my friends, I love my family, but the love I feel for Ruby is insurmountable, indescribable, incredible... and the purest of pure feelings that completely consumes me from head to toe. I am the luckiest woman alive.
G'night.
xoxoxo

ps. And to my friend... hang in there, things do get better & until they do, just look to your side & you'll find me right there next to you. *hug*



FIRST DAY OF FALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ruby In Her Own Time...

AHHHHHHH FINALLY!!!!!!! FALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THIS IS HANDS DOWN MY FAVORITE SEASON OF THE YEAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Not only is it my FAVORITE SEASON because of the GORGEOUS PERFEFCT WEATHER & THE TURNING COLORS OF THE LEAVES BUT THIS YEAR IT'S THE SEASON THAT I GET MY BABY GIRL RUBY!!!!!!!!!!!! Life is amazing... Ahhhhhhh =)

Today my buddy Steve & I went to Babies R Us & he bought me some things off my registry since he can't make it to the shower on sunday, so I picked out my HIP HAMMOCK! YIPPEE! And two AVENT sippy cups and two AVENT pacifiers as well as some 'fever cloths' that are disposable, they're supposed to help bring down a childs fever, let's hope I won't need to use them while in China, but better safe than sorry right? =)

Anyhoo, then we went to Salem Beer Works & had lunch & now I'm home. Tre my new frog is doing well so far... *fingers crossed* ... we'll see.

So I'm gonna go do some laundry now & catch up on my TIVO programs I have yet to get to. BBL. =)

-Me

Random thoughts...

Ruby In Her Own Time...

Is Kindness more important than Honesty?

Truly, some would say it is, to spare the feelings of someone you care about is more important than speaking your mind & the truth... God FORBID you hurt someone's feelings, sure it's clearly better to just be fake & lie to make that person feel good right? WRONG!

So, to those who would say that kindness is key over Truth telling, I say the following:
I BEG TO DIFFER! Personally I want to put all the damn cards on the table & let's just call a spade a spade shall we? All this 'being kind to save face' bullshit is FOR THE BIRDS! You know, nobody ever said that life was easy, and you don't ever get dealt a royal straight flush on the first hand BUT YOU KEEP TRYING right? I mean isn't that what the point of playing the game is all about? The chance that someday you might just get lucky & get one hell of a hand?

Look, if you like someone, say so, NONE OF US is ever guaranteed a tomorrow. Christ, just BE YOURSELF and SPEAK YOUR MIND! SO FEW people do that these days and if I hear one more crap line from someone who is just trying to be 'kind' or spare my 'feelings' I'm going to CRACK!

I am NOT a fragile bird, or an antique piece of porcelian... I am tough as nails & can handle the truth from ANYONE. Sure I may not always like it but make no mistake, I'd rather hear the real deal than try to discipher sputtered out sentence fragments of some half truths that were easier to not only to say, but perhaps also to swallow. BULLSHIT!

So, is Kindness more important than Honesty?

You tell me?

Wednesday, September 21, 2005

3rd time's the CHARM... LET'S HOPE!!!

Ruby In Her Own Time...

Ok, so laugh if you must but SERIOUSLY AGAIN I COME HOME TO A DEAD FROG! First time with Tad, was pretty devastating, I had her for nearly 10 years, so she was very special to me... this time, I get back from NH to find my newest little albino friend Peanut STONE COLD STIFF at the bottom of the tank, DON'T ASK CUZ I DON'T KNOW WHY, I wish I did.

So, I have a little 'moment' with Peanut before I say a few words, give her the 1 flush salute & send her to that big frog tank in the sea! UGH Such a bummer, anyway, so I call the pet store where I got her from, it's in Salem, and the guy is so very nice & sweet ( not to mention totally cute too) and he says that of course he remembers me & to come right down for another frog for free and he's so sorry about Peanut. He also remembered that I was adopting from China & asked if I had received her photo yet, HOW GOOD IS THAT! So when I went down there, he and I chatted for a few & I showed him Ruby's pic and he said she was gorgeous & contratulations over and over and over. How lucky I was to be becoming a mother to such a beautiful little girl & what a wonderful thing I was doing, etc etc etc... the usual things that kind people say to me when they hear that I'm adopting. Anyway, so we shoot the shit for a few & he takes me out back to pick out a frog, and I tell him to just pick one out himself because they were all gree this time ( no more albino's, so it didn't really matter) and so there's now a small green FAST frog in my tank once again. I need there to be 'life' in that tank on the kitchen counter, don't ask but I just like knowing that Ebby & I aren't the only ones up here ya know? So, back to the pet store, before I left he made me promise that I'd come down with Ruby once we're both home from China and to have a wonderful trip etc... He's a doll! Younger, but a doll nonetheless, I think he's 28 or 29... anyhoo, so dead frog made me sad, but new frog allowed me to flirt, not a bad gig. ;)

I'm gonna go catch up on my TIVO for a bit, catch everyone later!

-Amy

ps. New Frog's name is: Tre' the Charmer ( Tre' for 3rd and Charmer cuz THIS TIME HAD BETTER BE THE CHARM!)

Tuesday, September 20, 2005

NH & TAX FREE SHOPPING!

Ruby In Her Own Time...


Ok, so I'm up here with Jen & we went to the mall today and did some TAX FREE SHOPPING! I didn't buy a ton but did manage to get a new hands free earpiece for my cell phone, it's weird though the old one was just a little ear bud but this new one is some funky contraption that curls up & around my whole friggen ear! It'll take some time getting used to it I know but that's ok, the old one broke so I needed a new one! Ok so I also got a little yankee candle, this new scent called Cinnamon Apple Cranberry OMG SO GOOD!!! Jen's whole apartment smells DELICIOUS!!! We went to Olive Garden for their soup salad & breadsticks lunch, MAN WE NEED ONE OF THOSE ON THE NORTH SHORE OF MA! grrrr Maybe someday... For right now I'm gonna go curl up & get some rest before Jen & I watch 'Fever Pitch' she just bought the movie tonight but right now she's taking a nap so I should do that too. G'night for now, maybe more later. =)

-Amy




Monday, September 19, 2005

Prayers for my best friend...

... my closest & dearest friend in the whole world suffered an incredible loss this past weekend. My heart is broken for her & her dear husband and I ask all of you who read my blog to please say a silent prayer tonight that she may slowly start the healing process and know that her family & friends are always here for her to lean on no matter what. I love you my dear friend, always & forever. Tonights entry is dedicated to Spec, you will always be remembered & never far from our hearts.

-Amy

Saturday, September 17, 2005

My Fuzzy Best Friend & NEARLY FINISHED STOCKINGS!!!



Ok, so could my sweet fuzzy boy Ebenezer be ANY CUTER?!@#$@#$%#$% I JUST LOVE HIM TO PIECES! I had to share that pic but honestly, this post is about something else, that picture of the stocking I posted earlier was just the image that comes with the kit, not the actual stocking I did for Ruby, HOWEVER THIS ONE IS! I tweaked with it a little & made it my own but everyone loves it, including ME! So, the stitching part is done & now I have to send it to a woman in CA who will now sew it all together as a 'finished product', cuz for right now it's just the stitching that I've accomplished... ( but make no mistake, it was a labor of love since I've been working on it since last year!)

HOPE EVERYONE LIKES IT!!!!!!!! =)

-Me

Beautiful Written Language...

Chinese Characters for American Names...

I thought this site was great! I recently ordered two CHOPS, one for my Ruby and one for my niece Isabella and this is the site where I was able to get the Character translation for their names. Ruby & Bella, SO NEAT! Just thought I'd put it out here for anyone else interested in looking up their child's name... ENJOY!

-Amy

Friday, September 16, 2005

Prayers for Gwen...


GwenBlog

Tonight I am using my blog for the greater good... I am reaching out to everyone who reads my blog whether on a daily basis or just once in a while... If you're reading these words, I'm asking you to PLEASE keep my friends in your prayers!!! They are currently in China with their precious baby girl Gwen who is unfortunately a very sick little girl. Please PLEASE, whether you believe in God or Buddah or Allah or whatever higher power put your faith in, remember my friends Karen & her husband Scott & their very small, very precious, very sick but VERY STRONG little girl Gwen when you say your prayers tonight. I believe in the power of prayer & I hope that the more people who have them in their thoughts & prayers, the healthier this sweet little girl will become & soon they will all arrive back in the USA a happy healthy whole family of 3! Thank you all SO MUCH! And to Karen & Scott who have shown themselves to be true warriors & the rock that their darling Gwen can lean on, I am forever going to be impressed with the love and dedication & unconditional commitment I'm seeing through your daily blog entries as you walk this path that is parenthood. Your love shines from China all the way to the states like the brightest star in the sky... it is imeasurable & pure & constant... a true love that will last forever. God bless you all & may he keep our little friend Gwen in the palm of his hands & close to his heart. She is one very strong little fighter... she takes after her mother. *BIG HUGS*

-Amy

Thursday, September 15, 2005

Finished stockings, Survivor & house & Finding Ad's...


Ok, so I'm FINALLY FINISHED with Ruby's Christmas Stocking! ( the above pic is just a sample pic, I haven't found my digital camera to take an actual picture of her finished stocking but I will eventually, this just gives you an idea of what it looks like!) hehehe AND MAY I SAY: GOOD LORD THAT TOOK FOREVER!!! I am finished just in time to send it to the woman in CA who sews it all together with the felt backing & silk lining & all. I am THRILLED that it will be back here in time for Ruby's First Christmas as my baby girl! Life is good... =) Now, because I'm a glutton for punnishment, I am currently starting Stocking #2, for my unborn Niece Isabella Grace. ( My brother's baby...) Anyway, so I figure if I start it now, then her stocking will be ready for NEXT CHRISTMAS! lol And not a moment sooner! I'm good but hell, I don't have a magic wand! =) Now, it' off to watch Survivor & House eppisodes from this week, and may I say, yet again... GOD BLESS TIVO! ;)

More tomorrow. ;)

-Me

OH WAIT, I ALMOST FORGOT!!! In my email today I received the following:


From: brianstuy@research-china.org
Subject: Re: Please FIND MY BABY'S AD!!! =)
Date: September 15, 2005 12:34:46 AM EDT
To: AmyLa72@verizon.net


I have located your daughter's Jiangxi finding ad. It
contains her picture in black and white, as well as
other personal information.

I can make a photo of her ad for $35, which will
include negatives for later reprints.The ad is not
translated, but if you have no one that can do that
for you I can arrange for the ad to be translated for
$5. Research-China works with original newspapers,
not copies, to insure that the quality of your child's
ad is a high as possible.

I also have an extra copy of the actual newspaper page
her ad appears on which I can let you have for an
additional $40 ($75 total). Purchase of the newspaper
includes the close-up photo of her ad. It comes with
the request that you not make copies of it for other
families, but instead refer them to me. As you can
imagine, it has taken a ton of time and money to
obtain these newspapers.

I have a wonderful DVD of the Fuzhou orphanage and
surrounding area. It is available for $25.

You can place your order through Paypal
(www.paypal.com) at bhstuy@juno.com, or send a check
to me at:

Brian Stuy
550 W. 2450 N.
Lehi, UT 84043

Please include your daughter's Chinese name, her
finding date, her finding location and her orphanage
with your order.

Thanks for writing!

Brian
www.research-china.org


HOW KEWL IS THAT!!!! So I've sent him his payment as of this afternoon & I can't WAIT to see what my little Ruby looked like in her finding ad, as precious as ever I'm sure! G'night!

Wednesday, September 14, 2005

I LOVE SURPRISES!!!!!!!!!!!

CADOAM (Chinese Adoption Document Organizers and MORE)...

Ok, so I get home today from visiting with my babies, I missed Emma, Abi and Sam so much I HAD to go spend the day with them! So I get in & waiting for me in my mail was this 'surprise' package from my dear friend Katherine in NJ, MOMMY TO BEAUTIFUL ARIANNA!! So I open it and it's this fantastic GIFT CERTIFICATE TO THE ABOVE LINK!!! So I go & look at the items & get excited because I have enough to NOT ONLY ORDER TWO CHOPS (chinese name ink stamps) BUT LEFTOVERS FOR A LADYBUG ADDRESS BOOK & SOME LADYBUG NOTE CARDS!!!!!!!!! What a SWEET THING to come home to in my mail! THANK YOU KATHERINE!!!!!!! YOU'RE A DOLL & I LOVE YOU FOR MAKING ME SMILE SO BIG & FEEL SO SPECIAL TODAY! ;) I ordered two chops, one that says RUBY in english text & chinese characters & one that says BELLA also with text & characters. Ruby's is red ink and Bella's is black ink. I would've done Isabella but the characters are done by syllables so with only enough room for 'two' characters per stamp, Bella was the only option. ( For my niece who is due in a few weeks...) Thanks again Katherine, what a lovely surprise! I can't wait till my ladybug items & my CHOPS ARRIVE!!!!!!!!!!!! ;)

I just Love you!

-Amy

TIVO, Tea & Prayers

Ruby In Her Own Time...

Another tuesday night, another shot... no biggie, this MS thing is for the birds. Honestly if I didn't tell anyone that I had it, nobody would ever know. .. moving right along... So I'm still totally addicted to my two shows from way back in the day, and yes feel free to laugh, Dawsons Creek & Felicity. Yes, I know, I'm retarded... but TIVO ROCKS! Also, tonight was the first eppisode of HOUSE my show that is current that I ADORE! (truth be told, I have a HUGE CRUSH ON ACTOR HUGH LAURIE OMG OMG LOVE THAT MAN!) Sitting here, on the floor of my living room which is honestly where I've been spending most of my nights lately, don't ask. I have a perfectly good bed in my bedroom that sits empty night after night because, for whatever reason, I've been more comfortable out here in this room. I honestly don't know if it's the room or the couch (thanks Bernie & Phyl) or WHAT but I sleep out here night after night & am fine & well rested in the am. I'm enjoying a nice steaming cup of black tea & MAN IS THAT ONE OF THE BEST THINGS ABOUT BEING ALIVE LATELY! I love a good hot cup o tea, oh yeah, and I also just am head over heels in love with my precious baby girls BEAUTIFUL FACE! I can't stop staring at her, in my bedroom she's on my eMac, right here in the living room she's on my iMac, and in her bedroom her three original pictures from China are in beautiful frames on her bedroom bureau. I am so lucky sometimes when I think about it too long I just sit & cry because I am blessed beyond words. I need to get some sleep, but wanted to say to everyone who reads this tonight, please if you wouldn't mind, keep my friend's in your prayers tonight please. They are currently in China with their precious little one who is sick with RSV at the moment, and they need all the extra prayers they can get, thank you all so much to whoever reads this, I know that they will appreciate it too. And to my sweet birthday girl Ruby Cate Pei Mu... whatever she is doing at this very moment, I hope her heart knows that special things are in store for her & that a woman very far away loves her more than can possibly be measured, beyond the moon & the stars & back again, she is my world, my life, my everything... and I love her. Right now Ruby, I hope that your heart feels my love for you and smiles on the inside.

Love,

-Momma

XOXOXOXO

Monday, September 12, 2005

Life Is GOOD!!!

Passport renewal :$50.-
Passport pictures for China Visa: $10.-
Remaining Agency Fee: $4,000.-
Visa Cost per person: $130.-
FedEx cost to overnight documents to my agency: $30.-


Knowing that as of the moment those documents left my hands & were officially on their way to my agency I had NO MORE PAPERWORK TO WORRY ABOUT UNTIL I AM PHYSICALLY IN CHINA: PRICELESS!!!!

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh Life is good!



Sunday, September 11, 2005

Approval signed sealed & ALMOST delivered!!

Ruby In Her Own Time...

Well, it's official, I've checked the 'YES I ACCEPT THIS CHILD' box in the paperwork to go back to China and have all the necessary documents ready to go with passports & everything & will be headed to DHL first thing in the morning to send those to my agency overnight so they have them by tuesday! =) Once they have them they'll get put with the other acceptance letters from 7 other families in my group & then on Wed they all get sent to China. From there it's roughly 8-10 weeks before I travel. I must receive a TA (Travel Approval) first, then after receiving that, within a week or so I'm on a plane & off to get my beautiful birthday girl. Ronayne my friend who is traveling with me, is THRILLED because apparently today she realized that we'd be making a stop in Hong Kong, and I thought she knew that, but to listen to her go ON AND ON " OMG WE'RE GONNA GO TO HONG KONG, MY GOODNESS!!! etc etc etc" CLEARLY she didn't know at all & it was a very exciting tidbit of info for her, made her day. =) But then again, I'm always here to help. =) hehehe So for now, I continue to float on a cloud & just sit & stare at my little girl's precious face for hours on end. I know somewhere in the house there's probably dirty dishes to get to, or laundry just begging to be done, however... right now, all I want to do, is stare at that gorgeous little girl & periodically pinch myself because honestly I feel like it's all a dream. I'M IN LOVE!!!!!! That's all for now, more tomorrow I'm sure, I'm Italian and a LEO so honestly I just never shut up. G'NIGHT!

Saturday, September 10, 2005

Ruby's first 'home'...

http://halfthesky.org/02CentersPrograms/centers/fuzhou.html

Cut and paste the above link into a new browser window to see the orphanage where Ruby is currently calling 'home'!! I'm so happy because it looks like such a wonderful place filled with bright colors and clean spaces & toys & wonderful nannies & staff who truly care about the work that they are doing!!! THANK YOU GOD FOR PLACING MY BABY THERE UNTIL SHE CAN BE PLACED IN MY LOVING ARMS! WHAT LUCKY BABIES MY RUBY IS WITH!!! I can't wait to go get my beautiful BIRTHDAY GIRL!!

Friday, September 09, 2005

A Mother's Love...

I finally got the translation of Ruby's referral info. I had been dying to know where she was found & who found her etc... The following is what her referral said:

Fu Peimu, female, born on September 7, 2004 (her birthday was estimated according to her umbilical cord). On September 9th, 2004 she was abandoned at the front entrance of the Emergency Help center. (since child abandonment is punnishable by stiff fines & jail time, her biological mother shows not only courage but true love of her baby to have been brave enough to leave her in such an obvious & BUSY place. Clearly, she could've easily been caught & reprimanded for doing such a thing, yet her child's welfare obviously meant more to her and for that I am touched & amazed & forever grateful. That one act of selflessness and unconditional love will be something that I will forever be grateful for & Ruby will know that she was TRULY loved by her biological mother.) She was sent to our institute a staff of the Emergency Help Center. When she first entered our institute, according to the doctor’s check up, she was in good health.

She has six meals a day & her primary food is milk formula, egg, rice cereal made into a paste & noodles porridge veggies, egg & other foods. (basically my little birthday girl loves to EAT!) She is up at 6am every morning and takes one nap every day from 10-noon. (YIPPEE!!) She likes to sleep in a bassinet but the light needs to be OFF before she'll go to sleep. She sleeps very well at night but sometimes is fussy.

She can stand with support under her armpits. She can stare at a moving bell and with a slight pull of her wrist, she can sit very steadily. She grasps things tightly and can move her legs up and down. She likes to lean forward to wards people. She can LAUGH OUT LOUD. (LOL) MY DAUGHTER!!!
She recognizes those around her and can turn her head when people talk or call her name or when there is a sound from something nearby. She 'LIKES TO EAT' ( as if you couldn't tell from her beautiful pictures!! my baby is a healthy girl!) She can say MAMA and other simple words. She is timid and shy but quite ACTIVE and OUTGOING! ( also my daughter!) She likes to imitate, listen to music, talk, sing, and likes busy places. (WELCOME TO BOSTON BABY!!) She is VERY ENERGETIC and reacts QUICKLY! She likes to play with other children and is an outgoing girl. She likes to take baths and the closest person to her is her caregiver.

This was all documented on April 30th, 2005. (she was nearly 8 mos old at the time)

All her health info checks out WITH FLYING COLORS! MY BABY GIRL IS BEAUTIFUL AND HEALTHY & READY FOR AMERICA!!! ;)

I am blessed, that's it, I am so wonderfully, beautifully, incredibly blessed beyond all measure. THANK YOU GOD FOR MY GORGEOUS BABY GIRL, YOU HAVE MADE MY DREAM OF BECOMING A MOTHER COME TRUE!!!!!!!!!!!!

G'night Ruby, I hope to hold you in my arms very very soon! MOMMA LOVES YOU!!

XOXOXOXOXO

Wednesday, September 07, 2005

Because I just can't stop looking at her GORGEOUS face, here's one more...



Happy Birthday Baby Girl!!



It is with MUCH LOVE and GREAT JOY that I share with you all the FACE OF AN ANGEL!


On September 7th at 3:23pm, I got 'THE CALL' on my Referral of my beautiful healthy baby girl: FU PEI MU!!! THE CALL CAME ON HER FIRST BIRTHDAY AS SHE WAS BORN EXACTLY ONE YEAR AGO TODAY, SEPT 7TH, 2004! She is gorgeous & I am simply OVER THE MOON IN LOVE WITH HER! I leave on Nov 16th from Boston's Logan Airport to go to CHINA to get my beautiful baby girl & bring her home!!!!!!!!!! =)


Ruby Cate Pei Mu
Born September 7th, 2004

DC Quote:

Ruby In Her Own Time...

" The things that you want are there for the taking... you just have to believe that you deserve them. "

-DC

Do prayers EVER get answered??

Ruby In Her Own Time...

Here's the thing... I'm not much of a church goer but I do consider myself to be quite spiritual & a good kind person, THAT SAID, I want to know why it is that night after night, I say my prayer & it still has yet to be answered? Perhaps my 'prayer line' to the 'allmighty power' is flawed? I guess it's possible, I mean I did just toss my friggen cell phone through the wash the other day, what's to stop me from somehow messing up my 'spiritual connection' without ever knowing I did so? UGH it is true that SHIT HAPPENS and LIFE SUCKS and there's not a DAMN THIN YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT!

You know, I enjoy having this blog because it is really helpful to be able to just purge every night & get shit out on the table & go to bed & do my best to leave it behind. I woke up this morning on my couch after only having gotten 3 hours sleep AT THE MOST and realized that yes, it's a new day, but NO, MY REFERRAL STILL ISN'T HERE YET! I think at this point I'm ALLOWED to be pissy and honestly, until I see my baby's face for real, I think most of you would be wise to just avoid reading my blog... it'll just depress you.

My friend is very wise... things we've talked about are similar in nature but not exactly on the same page... but close enough for sure. Two souls walking parallel through similar lives but just slightly different. Regardless, our hearts are in the right place relatively speaking, so that's good. We both need that in our lives.

I'm going to go check the status of this new package on it's way to my agency... probably another travel approval but honestly, I hope & PRAY that it's my referral, I just need to see my child's face. =(

-Me

Late night ramblings...

... my head feels like someone or something is slowly crushing it with a vice... the dead center of my skull is full of this piercing pain like being stabbed in that one spot over and over, right behind my eyes. My neck is sore, my back is killing me and my shot hurt like hell tonight, like a goddamned bee sting. On top of all that, add to my stress level the fact that I STILL have not received my referral for Ruby. Oh and then add for good measure, some emotional 'goings on' with a certain 'friend' of mine and GOOD LORD it's enough to drive a girl MAD! And if I have to hear 'we'll see' ONE MORE TIME FROM ANYONE I'm going to pick up the BIGGEST HEAVIEST OBJECT I FIND AND HIT THEM OVER THE HEAD WITH IT! T used to say that all the time & it completely pissed me off, it's such a boring use of words... it's a cop out, people say 'we'll see' when they are too damn afraid to address the subject at hand. They hide behind those words, and it's lame. Yes or No work just fine for me, USE THEM PEOPLE! Anyway... I am feeling like I might as well have been hit by a train full force & am now completely numb. IF anything happens tomorrow I'll log it but otherwise, this crappy entry in the wee hours of the morning is going to have to do for now.

-Me

Tuesday, September 06, 2005

Another Day...

... another TA! Grrrr It seems like every day there's another package on it's way to my agency & each time, although I hope deep in my heart that it's my Ruby's Referral, it's just someone else's Travel Approval, which is great for them, but SUCKS for me! I swear, if I had a quarter for every minute I spent being patient during this whole adoption process I'd have enough money to bring EVERYONE TO CHINA WITH ME TO ADOPT YOUR OWN BABIES ON ME! ugh So there's another package on it's way to my agency tomorrow, due by noon their time, 3pm my time. We'll see, I've lost all the 'excitement' at tracking these packages to be honest. It was fun at first now it's just like setting myself up for yet another fall, so what's the use? I know she'll come when she's good & ready but it seems as though my future daughter is truly living up to what is now my current mantra 'RUBY IN HER OWN TIME' HAS OUTRAGEOUSLY HIT THE MARK THIS TIME! It's a great book but I think if I ever adopt again, I'll get a book that is titled something like "THE BABY WHO ARRIVED EARLY!!" or something like that. I'm tired, I babysat my munchkins tonight, and am still here in marblehead at their house right now. I just put all three of them down for the night, read the stories, gave out all the kisses to everyone & a few hugs as well. I love them so much & it's nice to know that even if my darling Ruby is taking her time sharing her sweet face with her Momma, my babies who I've loved for the past 3 & a half years are always more than willing to share their sweet smiles and hugs & kisses and "I love you!"'s with their nanny! I am truly blessed, even if it appears that my daughter is somewhat of a slacker ;) LOL

-Amy (in slow motion these days)

Sunday, September 04, 2005

Ahhhhh...

Ruby In Her Own Time...

Ahhhhhh MUCH BETTER! Brand new CELL PHONE! Same brand as before, Nokia 6015i, I'm very 'old school' and am a serious creature of habit so this is my phone of choice! ;) The only bummer is that all my numbers in the old one were lost so I only have a few numbers in this new one, no big deal. I honestly didn't call half those people anyway. I also got my ringtones back too, and am very happy now. I know, I'm retarded... whatever, I'm happy! =)

Family is coming tomorrow for a few days & they're staying in my room so tonight, after I'm done watching my friends Kids I'm going to strip my bed & put on new bedding etc to have it ready for them when they arrive tomorrow. For now, I'm going to go play with Kayla & Danny, she's nearly 4 and he's 2... and they're ADORABLE! ;) HEHEHE

More later maybe!

-Amy

Saturday, September 03, 2005

CELL PHONES!!! GRRRRRR!!!

Ruby In Her Own Time...

So it's not even 8am yet and I've been up & showered & dressed & am leaving shortly for the friggen Verizon Wireless place to get a NEW CELL PHONE YET AGAIN! grrrrrr I would very much like another Nokia but honestly, after two of them dying, I probably should switch to something else... but I JUST ORDERED A KEWL NEW FACEPLATE FOR THIS PHONE DAMNIT~! IT'S GOT A LADYBUG ON IT!!!!!!! I hope they can replace this with the same model if not, maybe I can write to the guy from ebay that I got the faceplate from & get the same one but just for whatever new phone model I end up getting should it come to that! grrrrrrrrrrr leaving here at 8:30am, want to be the FIRST in line at that place, NOT GONNA WAIT AT ALL! Need my phone cuz it's how my AGENCY gets in touch with me! Lovely that I'm days away from getting "THE CALL" and my cell phone decided to SHIT THE BED! ok, I need to go work more on Ruby's Christmas Stocking... it's so close to being finished I'd like to have it done within the next week or so. I think the deadline for having it finished in time to send to the woman in CA who sewes it & puts it all together is like Sept 15th or 17th or something like that, so I have a little more time. Ok, off to work on that, once the cell is working again, I'll blog it. PISSAH!

Let's try this again...

Ruby In Her Own Time...

Ok so there is one more package on it's way from Beijing to my agency... it's left Beijing but so far hasn't touched down in CA. I will obviously be tracking it but I think this time, until I get the call from my agency that YES it is INDEED my referral, I am going to just chill & be a silent observer. The events of the last few days were the roller coaster ride from HELL! Talk about a fast ride straight into a brick wall! ugh...

So, for now, new package on it's way & once I know more, I'll post more. But for now, I'm going to sleep, gotta get up bright & early to be the first customer at the cell phone store to get a new phone, mine died completely tonight.

Later Gater!

-Me

Thursday, September 01, 2005

False Alarm...

Ruby In Her Own Time...

It was TA's (travel approvals) that they received today, not referrals. HOWEVER, as of right now, there is another package headed to my agency from China, and I'm hopeful that this time it WILL be my daughters referral. I will track it online & keep my blog up to date but the DHL guy says that because of monday being a holiday, it's schudueled ETA is by Noon, this coming Wednesday, Sept 7th. No more to type for now, I'm emotionally drained & need to go curl up & nap. Sorry.

SHIPMENT DELIVERED!!!

Ruby In Her Own Time...

TRACKING SUMMARY:
CURRENT STATUS: SHIPMENT DELIVERED!
DELIVERED ON: 9-1-05 9:50am

OMG !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ANY MINUTE NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! C'MON CALL DAMNIT CALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WITH DELIVERY COURIER!!!

Ruby In Her Own Time...

OMG IT'S ON IT'S WAY TO MY AGENCY!!!!!!!!!! I CAN'T EVEN BELIEVE IT I'M SHAKING LIKE A LEAF & THIS IS SUCH A WONDERFUL DAY, MY FRIEND KATHERINE FROM NJ HAD THE SAME DTC & LID AS ME & SHE JUST GOT HER BEAUTIFUL DAUGHTERS REFERRAL & HER LITTLE GIRL IS 10 MONTHS OLD TODAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OMG WHAT A WONDERFUL DAY THIS IS, I THINK I'M GONNA FAINT!

ONE SMALL STEP FOR MAN

Ruby In Her Own Time...

ONE GIANT LEAP FOR MY REFERRAL!!!!!!!!!!!!! Ok, current status is this...

at 6:56am pacific time it arrived in WA at the DHL facility!

NOW I JUST HAVE TO WAIT TILL DHL DELIVERS IT TO MY AGENCY BY NOON THEIR TIME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OMG OMG OMGWOOOOOOO HOOOOOOOO

STILL IN TRANSIT!!

Ruby In Her Own Time...

REFERRAL STILL IN TRANSIT! I've got my camcorder all set up on the tripod in the living room, aimed at my favorite toasty chair surrounded by all my books that I LOVE and have my Ruby Journal and special pen courtesy of my BEST FRIEND IN THE WORLD, JEN, SOON TO BE MOMMY JEN! YEAH SPEC! HEHEHE I have my cell phone on the ottoman in front of the chair & it's ready to go & I have my RED SOX hat on cuz it's just a bad hair day all around so hats are GOOD! I have a little list of things to remember to ask Eric when he calls from my agency to tell me he's staring at Ruby's BEAUTIFUL FACE! OMG I'm bundling all my emotion up inside but trust me, when that call comes & I hit record, it'll all come rushing out and the tears will flow... HAPPY TEARS!!!!!!!!!! OMG RUBY MOMMA CAN'T WAIT TO FIND OUT ALL ABOUT YOU BABY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Everyone keep Ruby & Me in your prayers today... I know we're going to need them for sure!

'ON THE ROAD AGAIN!!!'

Ruby In Her Own Time...

REFERRAL IS ON THE ROAD AGAIN!!! As of this morning current status is: "In Transit" it left San Francisco at 4:06am & is on it's way to Washington state! OMG OMG OMG OMG I am feeling sick to my stomach I need to go sculpt to direct all this nervous energy towards something! But first A COLD SHOWER! OMG OMG OMG MORE LATER AS IT HAPPENS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!